Moonlit Scars

Seray

Nothing could dull this pain.

I looked out into the lake, hands folded over my lap. I hadn't moved in hours. Numbness was settling in my bones like a drug, pinpricks running down my legs and back. Around me, the world slowly turned dark. I still didn't move.

This place used to be our favorite weekend getaway. Picnics on the shore, walks around the lake... My uncle and Özge hala would sit on a picnic blanket and the rest of us- my brother, Kaya and I would play in the nearby woods. We used to look for bird nests, played hide and seek and imitated wild noises to scare each other. As we grew older, the getaways became less frequent but still once in a while, my brother and I would come here. We would split a bagel between us, drink lukewarm coffee and talk about our day. Just the two of us.

Now the lakeshore looked like a grave, trees reaching for the sky, their branches stripped of leaves. The lake still sparkled in the evening light but its beauty seemed to fade away as the sky grew dark. That saying was right- beauty was in the eye of the observer. There couldn't possibly be any beauty in a world where my family left me one by one.

The thing was, in the back of my mind I knew that my brother was dead. He was shot and kidnapped as Ayleen had put it and when they held the memorial service for him, I'd been so angry with her. Now I realized that Ayleen was sparing me the heartache, by hiding those evidences from me. I felt like I was drowning in a pitch black void, with no way to find myself back.

A shadow fell over me, obscuring me from the fading sunlight. I looked up, my neck protesting in pain. Demir Kartal stood there, looking down at me, his phone pressed to his ear.

"I found her", he said before pocketing it. His eyes looked like steel traps in the dark.

"Get up, we're going home"

I looked back at the lake. That place- that mansion wasn't a home. It was a place where dreams went to die and nightmares awakened.

He lowered himself on one knee next to me, brows pulled down over his eyes.

"I had to track down your phone to find you. Get up. It's getting dark"

I'm not going anywhere with you, I thought snidely.

"Now that you've seen me all good and healthy, leave me alone. I'm not dead yet", I said. "Although you're probably hoping for the opposite"

A muscle moved in his jaw. "Either you get up and come with me or I'll just drag you from here. Your choice"

I looked at him then, feeling suddenly angry. His eyes hardened at whatever he saw in my expression. Shooting his hand out, he pulled me up to my feet forcefully.

"Let me go!" I started struggling. "Why are you such a bully? I didn't do anything to you. I have no idea why you pick on me so much!"

He released me abruptly and I almost fell back into the lake. Then he regarded me through narrowed eyes.

"You're just angry because I didn't sugarcoat what happened to your brother", he said. "You're angry because I was honest"

I touched the red marks he left on my wrist. "You were not honest. You were cruel. Something obviously upset you early in the morning and you took it out on me. In the cruelest way possible"

I turned away from him and started walking towards the main road. I took a taxi here and I could take a taxi to go back too. Didn't need a lift from him.

He grabbed my arm again. "My Jeep is over there. Where are you going?"

"Don't touch me!" I lashed out, pulling my arm from his grip. "Leave me alone!"