A/N: I eally like where this is going. Don't hate me at the end of this chapter ok it will all work itself out (or so you hope mwuahahaha >:D)(jk I'm not THAT cruel)(or am I)(I hope not, the only character I would kill off unless 100% necessary is Sarah, if she is ever a character. Oh, and Keltie. Definitely Keltie.) Ok, and as always, enjoy, rate,comment, yell your feelings at me after. I don't care, I like it all. And remember, Ryan and Brendon love you, you awesome readers!
[woah, keep quiet, let us sing like the doves and decide if it's done with purpose or lack thereof.]
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BRENDON'S POV
"Ryan, you-you... killed yourself?" He takes a deep breath and looks up at me with those eyes up through his lashes and the simplest answer comes out of his mouth.
"Yes."
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I want to know why, but I can tell it is a hard subject to talk about. I just shift him to sit in my lap and hold him as he starts to cry.
"I'm sorry Bren, I'm such a hyppoccrite and I didn't want you to get angry again, I--"
"Ryan, stop. I'm not mad. If anything, I'm glad you had the courage to tell me... And I could never do that to you again, Ryan. I was so torn apart by the look on your face when I hurt you, I just can't. I'm not going to hurt you again." His shoulders are shaking slightly, and I can hear his ragged breaths breaking the silence that has just settled over us. I look over at the clock on the wall and it's almost 4.
Wait.
My shift ends at four.
"Ry, I gotta go. My double-shift is almost over and dad is gonna kill me if I'm not home soon." He looks at me with those big, puppy dog eyes. I know what he is about to say, I know I can't do it. If it was possible, I would've done this a very long time ago... Before dad started beating me.
"Why don't you leave him?" He continues to give me that face.
"I can't... He has complete power over me until I'm eighteen."
"Then run away, once I'm normal... I'll come with you." I want to smile, because it is very endearing.
"I don't know." His lips quirk up a little. I bend over and kiss his forehead. He gets out of my lap and we stand and I walk to the back and get our pants. I throw his at him and slip mine on. I put back on my socks and shoes and look over at Ryan, who has done the same.
"Can I walk you up to the boundary?"
"Yeah," I breathe.
He laces his fingers with mine and we exit the cabin, side by side. It seems like five seconds before we reach Ryan's boundary, the god forsaken thing, and he lets go of my hand. He brushes his lips against mine and I can swear I hear the faintest click in the background before he mutters a quick goodbye and scurries off to the cabin. I look around, confused. I hear the shuffling in the undergrowth, and I'm probably just being paranoid.
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Kellin's waiting at the back door of the shop and lets me in. He takes one look at me, and I'm pretty sure he can't tell exactly how it went. But there is one thing he can tell--
"Dude. You totally got laid." My face burns red and I look down at the ground.
"Shut up."
"Nah, like really. I can tell. Little Brenny finally got some! Yeah man!" He pats me on the back, and I flinch because he narrowly avoided the largest bruise on my back.
"Thanks..." He can tell I don't want him bugging me, because I just go sit at a chair behind the counter and he goes back to taking orders. The clock stirkes four and I get up grudgingly. I do not want to have to see him again. But it doesn't seem to be a choice. At least when school starts in like, a week, I will barely ever see my father. I clock out and go talk to Kellin for a second.
"Hey, Kellin. Sorry for being so mad a minute ago... It's just, Ryan and I are having a hard time with my father and all, and I just... Thanks for helping me." I turn and walk out the back door and take my time walking to my house.
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When I get to my house, Dad's car is in the driveway. I go to open the door and it is swung open to reveal a sober, smiling father.
Okay, this is NOT normal. Well... Let me restate that.
This is NOT normal, at least not for him.
"Welcome home, son. How was work?" What the actual hell is he doing.
"Good, same old same old," I lie. I go sit in on the couch and he follows suit. Something's different...
"Oh really?"
"Yes." I realized what it is. There's a camera on the coffee table. My stomach curls into a thousand knots.
I think I'm about to be sick.
"So you do home deliveries, then? Is that why you weren't at the coffee shop, Brendon?" He is sniggering. "Is that why you went to that boy's house?"
"N-no..." I whisper, shaking my head.
"Oh, no, of course not. You were fucking him. No, no, wait. Lemme fix that statement. HE was fuckng YOU. You thought you could keep him a secret from me. Well guess what, you did a pretty shitty job of it. I mean, come on, isn't a teenager just walking down a highway and into the woods obvious? No, of course not, Brendon." He grabs the camera and turns it on. He pulls up pictures.
One of me and Ryan walking, nothing big there.
One of him kissing me. That's not good, but the worst is yet to come.
Not just a pictures, but also a video. I'm cemented in place and everything is crumbling around me. Now Ryan and Kellin are in trouble. It's all because of me.
He grabs my face and holds the camera in front of me, and hits play. Moans emit from the camera speaker as the scene unfolds in front of me on the camera's screen. Through a peek in Ryan's curtain, my dad had seen it happen. Every kiss, touch, connection, every moan. All on video, in pixels for some kind of revenge. Bile is threatening to come up from my throat and my eyes are blinking rapidly to hold back tears.
"Oh, Ryan! Oh, fuck, Ry!"
"Oh, Bren!"
He pauses it and pushes me away.
"Don't even think you're going to see him under my watch. And speaking of Ryan, that is where he lives, if I am not mistaken?"
I swallow hard and lie through gritted teeth, "No... We just meet up there sometimes. He lives in the next town over."
"Okay." He puts the camera down and looks back at me. "Oh, and Brendon?"
"Yes, dad?" I say very hesitantly.
"You might want to warn Ryan... It'd be a shame to see him get injured. Oh wait, you can't!" He yanks me up by the shoulder and drags me to my room. He must've changed the lock, because it clicks and when I try to open it, it's locked.
I hear the front door close and not soon after, Dad's car pull out the driveway.
And I can't stop him.
I can't help Ryan.
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A/N: SORRY DON'T HATE ME ;-; and now for some of Lying... because it really fits the mood rn.
[Is it still me that makes you sweat, am I who you think about in bed?]
[Let's get these teen hearts beating faster, faster.]
[The shock sets in and the stomach acid finds a new way to make you feel sick.]
YOU ARE READING
What I Really Am
Fanfictionthis used to have an intro, but since i wrote it two years ago i deleted it please don't hate me for abandoning it, i realized it was a shitty story imo :') but here i am finishing it for all of my loyal fans... ah yes there's still good old sex and...
