Care For Me ✔️

F I F T Y - S I X

L I L Y

Antonio was sleeping in Leo's room tonight so he could keep a close eye on him. I chose to sleep in Zac's room, craving the comfort of my eldest brother, whilst trying to give some in return. I could tell how he felt by the defeated look in his cerulean eyes. It broke my heart to pieces. I hoped he knew how much each of us appreciate him.

Jack and I may not have been part of this family for very long, but I couldn't help feel an overwhelming sense respect for Zac, I knew Jack felt it to. Being only twenty four and having to take care of your ten younger siblings must take its toll. He's been the legal guardian off the boys since he was a teenager and playing the role of a parent long before that.

I couldn't help the pang of pity that washed over me, thinking of everything he's missed out on in life. Sure he has Grey, but I think we all forget that our second eldest brother is only twenty one. He's at an age where he should be going out to clubs, partying with friends, finding a girlfriend and just living his life. He shouldn't be here having to help take care of a pack of teenagers.

They've both gave up what was meant to be their best years, all to take care of us.

I'll be eternally grateful.

"Are you okay?" I mumbled tiredly, turning round in the large king size bed to stare at my eldest brother, bringing the soft navy duvet up to my chin.

"Mhm, I'm fine Lil." He sighed, using his pointer finger to push his glasses up the bridge of his nose. His eyes never leaving the screen of his laptop, as he read over the email Dr Owens sent him regarding Leo.

"You don't have to do that y'know." I told him, I didn't want him to hide his feelings. There's been enough of that happening in this house already.

"Do what?" He asked, his blue eyes leaving the brightly lit screen, meeting my identical ones.

"Pretend." I simply stated. "You take care of all of us, but who takes care of you?" I sat up in the bed, tugging at the sleeves of the hoodie I'd stolen from Ace. "Who do you talk to when things start to become overwhelming? Who do you talk to when you're sad or defeated?" I asked, not once breaking eye contact.

They say that eyes are the mirror of your sole; your eyes speak the truth when everything else is a lie, because in reality your eyes are never quiet. You can fake small things; like a smile or a laugh, but your eyes hold all the honesty, every emotion you feel is spoken through the depths of your iris' — after all, I should know, I played the fake game myself.

Zac's eyes dimmed visibly at my words, he was trying to mask it — but as I've said, I'm more or less an expert.

"Don't worry about me bambina, I've got people I can to talk too." He lied, ruffling my curls — whether that be to distract me or to add to his lie; I'm not sure.

"Who?" I quipped.

"I talk to Grey, sometimes Ryan." He retorted, staring at me intently. "I said, you didn't need to worry."

"Telling me not to feel something, won't stop me from feeling it, Zac." I rolled my eyes mockingly. "Please, talk to me." I plead. "I know you don't go to Grey with your problems, you already hate the fact he helps you out as much as he does." I told him, knowing it was the truth.