A F F E C T I O N

o n e

I miss you a lot. I've been trying not to allow it, but I do. At home, especially. You were always there to keep me company.

"Where has Riel been?" Not here.

"I don't know, Mom." I reply, tartly. I hate that word; tartly.

"Did you two break up?" My father asks. I stare at the mashed potatoes on my plate and remember when you used to make a depressions in mine, then fill then with gravy to show me the drawing. Smiley faces, usually. Or Jesus.

"I think they did." My sister says. Shut up shut up shut up.

"That's too bad," both of my parents say. Too bad.

"Hey, did I see him with Annabel today?"

"Probably," I tell her. She makes a grotesque face.

Later, she comes to my room. To talk about you.

"I can't believe he left you. You're..." Popular. Pretty. Nice. Funny. Unleavable.
"And she's like, a nerd."

It's the classic romance novel problem, really, you left your popular girlfriend for the girl who skulks in the library. Gets straight As. Who's never going to cheat on you; not that I ever cheated on you. I love you, I always have.

They never tell you how the other girl feels, in the books.

It hurts. It's embarrassing. It's horrid.

I am never reading one of those things again.
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