Unconditional

25

hollie's pov:

God I love watching August interact with his son.

He jumps right into "dad mode" whenever he's around him. I adore it.

We sit on the couch, just loving on our son. I don't know where everyone else is, but I don't care. This is going to be a rare thing for us. Getting to spend time as a family.

I think a lot about that. How much different would things be right now, if I had said yes. Would I be living in California with Aug? Would he have come back?

What if things were exactly the same if I had said yes? What if nothing would have changed?

"Did you guys have any plans for tonight?" August asks me, out of the blue.

I shake my head.

"Then can I take you somewhere?" He questions.

Is he asking me on a date?

"Sure." I smile.

"I want to take you and West to the beach. I think you will love it." August softly smiles at me. I lean my head on his shoulder.

"Sounds like a plan." I say. "Aug, I have a question."

"Okay," He laughs. "What's your question?"

"Was JJ lying when he said you call me gorgeous, every day?"

"No. He's not lying," August nervously laughs. "I really do think you are Holls. I always have."

My eyes fill with tears. It wasn't until this moment, that I realized I need to loose my feelings for him. He don't can't be calling me gorgeous. He can't look at me like he loves me. I want to move on from, us.

It wasn't until just now, that I realized that maybe I have real feelings for Aleksander. That it's better for me to move on, then try to stay stuck in the past.

No. Maybe I still want love August. I want love every part of him. I want to love seeing him be a father. How he interacts with everyone around him.

He makes it so hard to stop loving him.

"Holls," August snaps me back to reality, from my internal thoughts. "Holls what's going on?" He asks, wiping a tear from my face.

"I'm seeing someone else." I blurt. The words come out, before I even have a chance to think about what I'm saying.

"Oh," August mumbles.

"No. No i'm sorry I'm not. I'm not-" My eyes flood even more.

"Hollie, look at me." August says. He's smiling.

Why the hell is he smiling?

"You don't have to apologize if you are. And if you aren't, that's okay too. I'm not going to be mad Hollie. We aren't together anymore," The words come from his mouth, and my heart shatters.

I don't know why it still hurts this bad. It's been ten months, and I still hate those words. I still hate that he left. I hate everything about it.

"... you don't have to tell me you are seeing someone else." He says.

I fucking hate this.