Calista

Chapter 1: Black space

I woke up in pitch black space. Wala akong maaninag kahit ano. I know my eyes are wide open, still, I can not comprehend where am I. I was practically blinded by the color of the surroundings.

But I can not remember how I ended up here.

The last time I remember. . .

Kumunot ang nuo ko, "Sandali, bakit wala akong maalala?" bulong ko, nagugulahan.

Biglang parang may pumitik sa nuo ko na nagdulot ng sakit na gumuhit mula sa nuo papunta sa likod ng aking ulo.

"Ugh. . ." Daing ko habang sapu-sapo ang ulo.

Nang tumigil ang sakit nito ay may biglang pumasok na memorya sa isip ko.

Malabo noong una, hanggang sa unti-unting  luminaw.

There's a girl, solemnly sitting on her bed with a bottle in her hand. Her body was full of bruised, looks like she was beaten in numerous times.  While she's blankly staring on the bottle; her eyes uphold nothing. She looks like an empty shell. A soulless human body. 

The bottle she's holding is a muriatic Acid. 

After a long deep sigh. She finally had a courage to open the bottle. With the help of her trembling hands, she managed to lift the bottle in her mouth. Sa huling pagkakataon, ang akala niyang luhang ubos na ay may maipipiga pa pala. Her last tears run down on her cheeks. With a couple of gulps, her body reacts instantly with the acids she takes.

Hindi ko namalayan na tumutulo na pala ang mga luha ko sa aking pisngi. Hindi ko na alam kung ano ang namamayani sa aking emosyon. Dahil ang babae nasa aking memorya ay walang iba kung hindi... ako.

Hindi ko na kayang panoorin ang aking sarili na bumubula ang bibig at namumuti ang mata.  Dahil naiinis ako sa sarili ko, bakit ito ang pinili kong paraan para mamatay!

Hayup! Ang pangit ko!

But I  realized, Siguro napuno na ako. Sobra na siguro sa sakit, sobra na sa lungkot at sobra na sa pagiging tanga at mahina.

I think those reasons drives me to get rid of my lousy and meaningless life.

Kaya siguro kahit sa pangit na paraan ko tinapos ang buhay ko kasi kating-kati na akong mamatay.

I already lived my 19 years of life with a constant pleadings of attention and love from my family. Pero ang nakakatawa, kahit anong gawin ko, daig ko pa ang hangin sa harap nila. I hate them, but still I want them to love me and care for me. Hipokrito, noh? Hayaan niyo na.

Now I know why I ended up here. I think this is the dimension through hell. I don't mind, anyway. Earth and hell are even... for me. Wala namang pinagka-iba---

"Do you want to review your past."

I was startled by the sudden voice in my head.

"Who are you?" I asked, a little bit afraid. "Where are you?"

I heard its soft chuckles, "You won't see me, I'm just in your mind."

Fuck! Am I hallucinating?

Nonetheless, I ask again, "Anong kailangan mo? Saka bakit hindi pa ako napupunta sa impyerno, di ba patay na ako?" Sunod-sunod na tanong ko. "Or else, sa langit ang deresto ko. Hindi naman ako masyadong naging bad sa earth, eh."

"..."

"Hey, answer me!" I demand.

"Do you want to review your past?" the voice ask again.

"Do I have a choice?"

"No."

Before I could complain, there's a sudden pain pierce my head and my memories starts to play.

There's a six years old little girl in a pink lovely dress. Her soft, long and ebony hair was tied up in two ponytails. Her beautiful eyes are extraordinary. She has rare condition of what they called heterochromia. The iris of her left eye is like a sky in sun shiny days--- it holds a color of sky blue. While her right eye is comparable to a sweet honey. It's a beautiful golden brown.

The only accessory that she's wearing is her necklace. The pendant has her name which is "Calista" meaning the most beautiful.

In their garden, she's happily contented playing with her doll--- but not until her sister dashed through her and force her to let go of the doll.

Of course, hindi niya binigay, kaya nakipaghatakan siya sa kapatid niya. Dahil mas matanda ang ate niya ng tatlong taon at 'di hamak na mas malakas, nakuha din niya ang gusto niya.

Calista stumbles that cause her to winced in pain. But being persistent as she is, while her sister is laughing at her state, the little girl grabs her sister's dress that cause her to have ankle sprain.

When the loud cries heard all over the house, their parents come to view. Dali-dali nilang nilapitan ang panganay nilang anak, ang mga mata nila ay puno ng pag-aalala. Pero nung sinabi na ng nakakatandang bata  kung sino ang may kasalanan ay dalawang pares ng matang may pagkadismaya at galit ang tumingin sa batang babae.

The father of the child abruptly march towards Calista and hit her merciless, even though she pleads with her sobs, their father remains deaf with her constant pleadings.

Inisip niya, normal lang sa magkakapatid ang magaway. Normal lang din ang bugbugin sa bagay na hindi pa napapatunayan ang katotohanan.

At the age of 6, she thinks it's right. But at her age, Calista knows she's helpless.