We Aren't Safe Here(BwWm)

Chapter 20

Hey guys, just a heads up, this chapter has suicidal thoughts and actions.
Also this is the long awaited spicy chapter.

[flips a table] 웃❤유

Amora's Pov

The following day was gray.

The house was quiet.

Everyone brought themselves to have a funeral for kat and mark,
and I sat in my room alone, unable to attend or watch.

The next day was even worse.

Early in the morning Gabriel had decided that he couldn't stay with us anymore... it was too painful.

He needed to go off alone, he said he would try to find some friends that lived up in Atlanta, and so, he said his goodbyes and left.

I hadn't eaten or slept for all that matters.

I was punishing myself, it was my fault that kat died, I shouldn't have brought her with me.

maybe if I deprived myself of basic necessities, I would purge the venom that was running through my body.

Emi would spend most of her day outside my door, trying to get me to talk, or open the door so she could see me.

I couldn't let that happen.
I imagine the poison running through my veins.
Maybe I was paranoid, but I could feel it truly, it felt cold and black, but when I looked down at my arms I was fine.

I would turn, it wasn't a matter of if, but when, And I wouldn't allow myself to turn anyone.

I was being neurotic,
I checked my body every couple of minutes for black veins or gray skin.
I was a Monster.

When would they put me out of my misery?

Tears started to drip down my cheeks. I curl my body into a ball on the creaky bed.

I listen closely as rain begins to fall outside.

"Amora... babe, you gotta eat something." Emi's voice bled through the shut door.

I hushed my tears and trapped my cries with my hand over my mouth.

"Please?" she whispers.
She nicks on again.

I sniffled

I hear her stand up "you're not gonna turn Amora, You're immune." she says assuredly

I hear her footsteps disappear.

WHAT THE HELL DOES SHE KNOW?!

I'M GONNA TURN AND KILL THEM, AND THEN IT WILL ALL BE MY FAULT.
I NEED TO PROTECT THEM.

Before I even think, I'm on my feet, I sloppily wipe my tears and move to the door.

I quietly open it and my swaying feet tip toe into the other room, it's empty.

My eyes lock on Allister's gun, the object needed to end me.

my shakey hands grasp the handle and I turn back to my room.

my tears become more rushed and my sight is blurred and I miss the body coming up the stairs.

I shut my door behind me and fall to my knees.

I crawl to the center of the room.

I take the gun in my hands.

If they won't do it, I will.

My nose begins to run as even more tears fall from my eyes.

I let out a small sob.

I place the gun under my chin. I let out a shiver.