everyone dies in the end.

16

Kaya was over this. She felt like a lion in a cage waiting to be let out and slaughter her captors. Except, she didn't know who her captors were. The ghosts? Or her mate?

Belle was right. She was trapped in this endless cycle. The past was slowly blending into the future.

"Just accept it," that little voice in the back of her consciousness whispered in her ear.

She still remembered what it felt like. To be caged in her father's grip as she attempted to fight for control of her arm.

Her mind was her cage. If Belle were alive, she'd tell her that her parents wouldn't dictate her life. She'd say that Kaya would be okay on her own and that she needed to learn to let go. But how could she let go?

How could she forget her parents? Forget the only reason she was alive was because of them? Forget how the only reason they were dead was because of him?

Her parents were her lifeline. They supported her and loved her and provided for her. And he took it away with just a stroke of a match.

She could've taken it away with just a stroke of her knife.

But no. That would've been too merciful. Death would not compare to all of the pain she had experienced over the years. The endless years of stifled emotions and bleak loneliness.

Her mind continued to wonder back to last night when she resisted the urge to kill him and instead dragged his body to his room. It was easier than she expected. All she had to do was support him as he listened to her in every direction.

In her hands he was a malleable scrap of metal that she hammered at until he got her vision right.

Carve his heart out, the little voice that resembled her mother's rung in her head. She remembered when she attempted to steal cookies from the kitchen before dinner and her mom found out. It was the exact same mix of anger and calm. She wondered how her soft, gentle mother could have such a little voice and sound like a deranged murderer.

They were just voices. Not real.

She got him into his bed as he keeled over and looked like he was about to throw up.

Let him choke on his own vomit.

She grabbed the trash can underneath his bedside and helped him throw up into it, slowly rubbing circles along his back, like her mother would whenever she got sick. It was really calming for her.

Bash his head in with the trash can.

She got up and left, going back to her own room.

You little shit. Don't even have the willpower to keep your word.

She brushed her teeth, making sure to erase any trace of the vodka that was slowly making her feel more and more intoxicated.

That entire night was hell. They didn't let her sleep. She was trapped in her own body, unable to move as she helplessly listened to her parents verbally assault her.

"I'm sorry," she would try to say. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry."

The morning was better. Sometime in the middle of the night they must've left and she must've drifted off into sleep.

Kaya tried to get as much done before they came back. She made breakfast as she listened to the morning radio, and she walked around the house exploring a bit, and observing interesting pieces of architecture, like the accents in the places where the walls met the artificial sky that were identical in almost all of the rooms.