Lenny: Do I take you straight to work?
Kurt: I got one appointment I got to get to sometime between 8:00 a.m. and 4:00 p.m. But she can wait.
Lenny: Good. And look at this.
Cassie: He's back at it again.
Kurt: Why isn't he at work?
Lenny: This woman has a grip on him. It's ridiculous. It's gonna ruin his marriage.
Eric: Thank you for breakfast, Mommy.
Mrs. Lamonsoff: Will you be coming by to watch Days of Our Lives later?
Eric: Well, we got to find out which twin murdered Renaldo, right?
Mrs. Lamonsoff: We sure do. Mmm-hmm.
Lenny: Hey, Mrs. Lamonsoff, good to see you.
Mrs. L: Nice school bus, Lenny.
Lenny: Thank you. Have a great day. Did Mommy make the boo-boo go away?
Eric: Don't tell the wife. What are you guys doing?
Cassie: Get in.
With the woman/ working out
Sally: What's Lenny's problem? They're so cute when they're little.
Roxanne: I know. I miss it.
Dianne: Ronnie, Ronnie, Ronnie. You miss that? Really? Stay. Stay. Don't you growl at me. Stay, baby, Stay-
Lady: Excuse me. Is your kid gonna be in here when the instructor comes in?
Dianne: That's not my kid. That's my lover, and he's very gentle.
Lady: Kids don't belong in here. That leash better not trip me up.
Dianne: Leash isn't gonna trip you up. It's your big-ass, hairy man feet that are gonna trip you up.
Roxanne: She was just joking around, sir. Cool it. You're gonna get us killed.
Creep: Welcome to Squat Fitness, ladies. Apparently your new instructor's running a bit late.
Sally: I'm sorry. It's only five till...
Creep: Yeah, so he asked me to lead you in some warm-up exercises.
Everyone follows his instructions
Creep: So, everybody, up on your feet, and let's take a deep breath. Good. Deeper... Really stretch out those lungs. And now let's shimmy. Shake the shoulders back and forth. Shake them. Very good, very good. Now let's do some jackhammer squats.
Right, put your hands in front of you like this. Just relax. And then squat up and down but fast. Faster, faster, there you go. Really fast. Faster, faster. Too fast. Do it a little slower. Now, everybody turn, face the back of the room, bend over, and reach for your toes.
Dianne: Why do we have to turn around?
Creep: If you please. And bend over as low as you can go. Now take the right hand and slap it against the right cheek. Relax the wrist and slap that right butt, slap it. Good, I want to hear that slap. Oh, yes, this is wonderful.
Kyle: Morning, ladies. You started without me?
Creep: Yes, just like you asked me to. Say it's true even if it isn't.
All the ladies: What?
Oh, you loved it! You loved it!
Ronnie bit him and everyone cheered as he ran out
Kyle: Anyway. I'm Kyle, and welcome to the summer session of Squatrobics 101. I wish they called it something else, but that's what they told me to say.
Okay, so, before we start for real, any questions?
People raise their hands
Kyle: Yes.
Lady: Are you married?
Kyle: No. Nope, I'm... I'm single. Yeah.
Sally: I forgot. You're so gorgeous, my head is spinning. I'm sorry. God.
Kyle: Go ahead.
Dianne: I have a very important question, and it's a two-parter. The first part of the question is, "Did a scientist make you in a lab?" And the second part of the question is, "Can I stick my tongue down your throat, please?"
Kyle: All right, guys, look, I'm flattered. Really, lam, but most of you are married and I happen to be gay.
Ladies: Of course he is.
Lady: Stay out of my bag, little man.
Ronnie: "pulls out a jock strap" Why does she have this?
Lady: That's not a jock strap, that's a G-string.
