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Nami woke up like she had just been electrocuted. She was sweating, her heart was racing and she was drenched in absolute fear. It took her a while to recognize the room she was in but seeing her phone on the bedside table provided enough comfort to assure her that she was safe.
Her eyes widened when she saw that it was almost noon and there were multiple missed calls from her worried roommates. Jaemin's blackout curtains were definitely effective; not even a crack of sunlight touched an inch of his room. It reached a point where she doubted if it already daytime.
Only when Nami sat up did she realize her whole body was trembling. Her breaths were rugged and hot, everything about her felt unsteady and unsafe.
Taking a moment to gather herself and masking her pain, Nami walked out of Jaemin's bedroom to find him in the kitchen. He looked fresh and more handsome than ever in a simple tee and sweatpants. It surprisingly made Nami's chest tingle.
"Hi." was all that Nami could say. After all, it was a little too late for a 'good morning' wish.
Jaemin snapped around at hearing her voice, visibly sighing of relief.
"Hi," he smiled. "I hope you slept well."
"I..." Nami was unsure how to respond. Saying she slept well would be a blatant lie, but it was the polite thing to do.
"I'm really sorry for the trouble," she said. Her face was warm from the shame of putting Jaemin through her little episode last night.
"I can't explain anything but I'll do what I must to pay you back. Or compensate, at least."
Jaemin stayed quiet. He poured the porridge he was heating up into a small bowl, picked up a spoon and placed both on the marble bar tabletop. He gestured for Nami to sit and she reluctantly obliged.
"There is absolutely no reason for you to pay me back. Or 'compensate, at least'," he said gently. "It was the least I could do. Hell, that's the bare minimum—anybody should do that for you."
Nami couldn't help the tiny smirk on her face. "But you don't do the bare minimum for anybody."
She expected Jaemin to laugh or make some snobby remark, but instead, he placed his hands in front of her on the tabletop and lowered his head closer to hers. Looking right into her dark brown eyes, he said, "And you're not just anybody."
Nami was starstruck at how he made her cold heart flutter. It was as if there was a butterfly factory in her stomach, churning out a thousand of butterflies flapping its wings in her guts. It was a rare, nearly overwhelming feeling that momentarily made her forget the uneasiness that hadn't left her since she woke up.
And now that she remembered, the factory of butterflies was burnt to a crisp and left for dead. The brief shine of light on her pretty face vanished, replaced by a look of pain, fear and resentment all at once.
Jaemin noticed the change. He always did.
Thus, he saw it coming; Nami's carefully structured response as a cover-up to what she really felt. He knew she'd put on that cocky, confident smile of hers and climb off the bar stool with her head held up high. He guessed that she thought if she held her head up high enough, she would forget the chains of her demons that shackled her to the ground.
"Thanks for the sweet gesture but just like how you don't let girls spend the night, I don't spend the morning,"
Jaemin knew that was coming too. That sickeningly sweet tone, laced with certain malice—but this time there was a shiver in her voice that he had never noticed before.
"I'll see you for the next round, lover boy."
Nami kept her smile until she left his front door, all the way down the hallway to the elevator. She kept her poise as she took note of the security cameras in the corner and maintained so until she was in the taxi home. The moment she arrived—fortunately, without her roommates in the common areas to interrogate her—she got into her bedroom and she broke.
She fell to the floor, barely making it onto the fluffy white carpet and almost hitting the cold tiles instead. She bawled like she never had before, whimpering so hard that she couldn't breathe. Her chest ached like there was a sword stuck through her back and the grief she felt was entirely excruciating.
The pain felt like that first day back from the hospital after the accident.
Even when she stopped crying, Nami didn't have the energy to pick herself up. All she could do was lay crumpled on the floor, eyes dazing off into the distance. She wasn't here anymore.
She was long gone.
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HOLY FUCK ITS BEEN A YEAR SINCE MY LAST UPDATE??????????????? i thought my eyes were playing tricks on me holy shit i am SO sorry
well i was long gone and now i'm back! just a short update for now. if anyone's confused i recommend rereading LMAO i'm sorry i promise it's not a marketing tactic
