𝐇𝐀𝐙𝐀𝐑𝐃 │ 𝐃𝐀𝐑𝐘𝐋 𝐃𝐈𝐗𝐎𝐍 ¹ [✔]

[14]: dreams

Although I anticipated dropping into unconsciousness when I lay in my bed. I found it hard to fall asleep. This never happened to me before.

I didn't know why. But my mother used to tell me when I was younger and couldn't sleep: "You do not sleep, either because you have run out of dreams, or you know you are going to have a bad one".

Being only ten when she told me this, I didn't quite understand at the time, but I think now I did.

What nightmare did my mind have in stall for me? Or did I run out of dreams?

It was obvious to me that I was slowly losing hope each day. I walked around camp in my silence each day, and I couldn't see myself doing that for the rest of my life, no matter how short it would be.

I knew that one day I would die. I had sure convinced myself I would die from being weak. Bitten by a walker or just falling awkwardly on my knife would do it.

I tried to think of anything that I could dream about. Anything I could anticipate for.

I found nothing... I felt empty.

+

I had fallen asleep that night and didn't dream of anything. Which was expected.

I got dressed into some ripped jeans and a large thin sweater. Trying to tame my bed-head, I was reminded that I would go days without brushing it, and I hadn't seen a mirror in weeks.

I used to be someone who cared so much for her looks, yet now, I hardly thought about it until now.

Shaking my head, I walked out of my tent and looked around to get an idea of what was happening.

Only a few people were up, and they looked to be doing everything with sleep in their walk. I figured I would be doing the same.

I knew Daryl was returning today (hopefully with a rabbit), and I would be the one to break the new to him.

As I walked to the edge of the woods to wait for him, I tried to come up with what I was going to say...

"Hey Daryl, can I talk to you?" - Ah no, too awkward.

"Daryl Merle was left..." - No too sudden

Wait? Why was I doing this like I was about to reveal an incredibly intimate thing with him? Then I did realise I was awkward as I was, so practicing would not help me in any way.

I sit on the floor, staring into the depths of the forest. I found it quite strange that I was just waiting for him, like a puppy at the door.

"Marley?" I heard a voice from behind me, I turned around and it was Lori.

"Can you help me with these clothes please?" she said sweetly. I nodded, leaving my place on the floor to help her hang up some clothes.

As I was hanging up the clothes next to her, gently humming a random tune, from the corner of my eye, I saw Rick approach us.

"Morning Officer," Lori smiles at her husband.

"Hey," he simply says. By this time, I was smiling to myself. I had always wanted to bemarried - the white picket fence deal, have kids and grow old with my husband or wife.

Again with the running out of hope thing. I tuned out as I was thinking about Jimmy Blake again.

I wondered whether he would have proposed to me at any time, or if he had given it any thought.

I knew I shouldn't be thinking about him... Daryl wouldn't like it if he knew I was.

Suddenly a high-pitched scream hit the air, everyone instantly jumping into the woods to find the source of the screams.