Pretty Boy

Prologue

                      ~Three Years Ago~

Serge:

Fondness. Fondness is all I feel. There's nothing more to it. I mean, if you describe feeling butterflies whenever you're with your best friend as like that, then fondness it is.

"Fuck, that was awesome." Hogan says, still gasping for air as he speaks. "What do you think?"

Lost in voids whirling around my brain, I try my best to compose myself and tilt my head to see Hogan staring right at me. I don't know why, but just seeing him right now instantly sends flutters of happiness to my stomach.

Still wandering in the state of commotion, I try to form an answer and clear my head off, but fail as I attempt to.

My mind is still stuck in the events of what just happened. I shouldn't make a big deal out of it, yet, here I am, being confused about what I'm feeling.

Thoughts about how soft his lips feel just messes my mind even more. Why did I even suggest "practicing" kissing with my best friend in the first place? Damn It.

With obvious highness still ambling upon me, Hogan speaks up and taps my hand. "Serge?"

"What? Yeah, I guess it went well." I reply, trying to cover up the excitement that's blissfully electrifying my body.

Hogan switches to his side and lays on one elbow while looking at me, amazed. "Just well? Dude, You were literally tongue deep inside my mouth and still, you're acting like you didn't like it."

"I did like it." No. I love it. I didn't say that, though. "But I wouldn't deny, you're actually a horrible kisser" I continue, trying to add humour, so he wouldn't notice my baffled state.

He creases his brow and stares at me with those hypnotizing green eyes. "What? No, I'm not."

He probably isn't, and he definitely just proved that to me a few minutes ago. But still, it wouldn't hurt to actually taunt him more about it.

Loving his slightly offended look, I just smile at him and teasingly lick my lips.

"You're unbelievable" He huffs and rolls on his back once again. Leaving us both staring at the ceiling.

               ********************

Minutes have passed and my mind is still trying to make sense of what just happened. I should probably ask him how he's feeling since I'm the one who urged him to practice.

With silence stretching longer within seconds, Hogan lets out a groan and suddenly speaks up.

"What do you think it would feel like to be in love?" He asks with serious curiosity in his tone.

Good question. And it's also something you should never ask to a person battling with conflicted feelings. "I don't know. I'm not sure if I felt that before" I answer.

"Yeah? I think it's heavenly though" He says with a smile tugging his lips. "My mom said that it was instant love when he met my dad" He adds, looking fascinated by the thought of it.

I place myself in a seated position and try my best to not act so interested with his unexpected revelation. "Heavenly, really? How?"

"I just think the whole idea of being with someone who you care for, seems charming." He says.

I could definitely see where he's coming from. And with his description, I think I want to long for that too.

"It's just like having a best friend, you know? Feeling all sorts of fondness whenever you're with them." Yeah, his description definitely hits home.

My mind still circles on the word "fondness" and how the thought of it ultimately makes my body thrill. I don't even know if I should be happy, given how he just described love, to being with a best friend, yet here I am.

Letting his words sink in, I try to define once again what I've been feeling.
Feelings that keep confusing me for the past few weeks. Feelings that make me change every perspective I have of him. Because if he's right and that's truly what the word stands for, then I guess fondness is actually just me being in love with him.