The Forgotten Princess (Forgotten Royals)

Chapter Eleven

Sleep had grown difficult since moving into the gatehouse. The bed was more suited for soldiers and cold always managed to slither into the room. When I rolled around in the bed, unable to get comfortable, it was hard not to think of everything I lost and everything I could never have.

If my brother had been put on the throne, Richard would have been a perfect match for me. The world believed he was the Duke of York's son and no one could dispute that he was descended from Castile royalty. My brother never would have refused me.

Every night I tried to force away the wishful thinking, but always failed. It didn't help that I had nothing to do in the long days. At least Richard was able to go on an adventure. When he wrote to me, he painted a picture of the world beyond the intrigues of England. So many names and places that I would never see. I should have been jealous, but my heart lifted when I caught a hint of pride in his words. For once, he wasn't a second son, or a rumored bastard. He was an English knight on an important mission. He deserved happiness.

I met someone who once knew my mother. Faith, it's good to hear someone speak of her with respect or speak of her at all.

I beamed, almost able to hear Richard's voice.

Only Richard's letters brightened my life as the year dragged along. Despite departing to Denmark, he found someone trustworthy who always managed to deliver the letters to Catrin. It was clever since my stepfather wouldn't care about her. A faithful friend, she always gave them to me without breaking the seal.

I just had to endure her teasing about Richard.

We were still careful with letters. He never hinted at intrigue and only shared the most innocent appearing topics. Poor Catrin had to listen to me since there was no one I could speak to about it.

"Sir Richard writes that Princess Philippa wore white for her wedding! Can you imagine?" I giggled. "I can't believe he remembered to tell me."

Catrin tried to fix her hair as the autumn winds battered it. "I couldn't believe it the tenth time you told me."

I flushed. "Forgive me. I..."

"It's of no moment, my lady." Catrin clucked her tongue. "I understand your York is a wonder. But I'm a little more amazed by the princess' terrible taste. Who ever heard of wearing white for a wedding? You'd think she'd want something more colorful."

"I think it's pretty," I said.

"Then you have terrible taste, my lady." She gave me an impish grin. "When you wed that York, please wear something that doesn't make you look like a ghost."

My spirits plunged. "If I wed him."

"If!" She snatched the letter from me. "No knight would write this excruciating detail about a wedding dress unless it was true love."

"We're friends," I said. "We can't be anything else."

Even as I spoke, I knew it was a lie. Our letters were circumspect, but there was always the promise of a future. In the last one, he made it clear that living arrangements were on his mind.

My brother still has a debt for the disgrace he brought on innocents. If I cannot afford a household of my own, he would be honor bound to house my wife.

The one mention of a future wife in our correspondence. I had little enthusiasm for living with Richard's brother, but anything was better than remaining at Usk. As much as I hated his brother for destroying my family with his schemes, I would make my peace with me if Richard married me.

But I still feared to harbor the hope.

"Friends," Catrin said in a disbelieving tone. "I understand a lady must always play the game and act unattainable, but when he returns..."