i had a dream about
drake last night
finally he called me up
and asked me what sort
of sandwich i wanted
for the last and final
meeting we'd have
it broke my heart
when i told me
and i could feel
decades of pain
summoning a lump
in my shaking throat
but i held the tears
as he told me that
he was tired of
putting up with my shit
because i called him
out for lying
and he was tired
of my never being happy
i hung up the phone
and told my father
and grandfathers
and they asked why
i wasn't crying
i told them that the tears
hadn't come yet
that they were building up
to be released later
in a storm
and they laughed
because they knew
i was not nearly kidding
i woke up in
a cold sweat
and with a pit
in my stomach
knowing he had left
but as i realized it wasn't real
i looked around my room
and the image of a
skinny flower bush
stuck in my mind
and it struck me
that this was the first of
my dreams to ever
take place in my new house
so i don't know what
that says about me
or my mentality
or growing up
but i know something has changed
i just can't put my
finger on what
