CHANGE

SEVENTEEN

HARRY

"So Harry, we've heard we're in for a surprise in this interview" the interviewer says brightly, her cheeks rosy and clearly excited. Harry gives a nervous smile, quite unusual for him, and the interviewer smiles knowingly.

"So stay tuned, and have a listen to Justin Bieber's new song, Yummy, to find out what Harry Styles has up his sleeve. I promise you'll want to hear it!"

The interviewer takes off her headphones as Harry squirms in his seat, extremely nervous for this performance.

"Studios just through here" the interviewer says, standing up and Harry follows her into a fairly small studio with a medium sized piano in the middle. There are cameras at several different angles in the small room, and Harry's management stand to the side, ready to oversee the performance.

Harry is going to miss this management, they're respectful, and allow him to be him. Not like Modest! But alas, that's what he's going to be stuck with from now. He sighs, and the interviewer looks at him kindly, "Ready? We'll be on air again soon".

Harry nods slowly, hands in the pockets of his casual checked jacket.

He settles himself at the piano, pressing a few keys gently before leaning back and nodding to the interviewer. "Okay, ready when you are".

She gives him a thumbs up and leaves the room, closing the soundproof door and management following. This leaves just Harry and the cameras. He's nervous about this one, and for a slight minute he feels sick in the pit of his stomach, and regrets doing this song. Too late now though.

He pulls the earphones over his head and immediately hears the interviewers voice again.

"Okay so now, what you've all been waiting for, Mr Harry Styles everyone, with a surprise performance of his unreleased song, Falling!".

Harry then begins to play the piano softly, exhaling shakily. The keys are deep and soft, a beautiful sound coming from the instrument.

"I'm in my bed
And you're not here
And there's no one to blame but the drink and my wandering hands"

Harry couldn't count the amount of nights he'd laid in bed, regret clouding his life, preventing him from living. What made him feel worse was the fact that he couldn't even tell Louis the truth, that he'd cheated on him, betrayed him in the worst way possible.

"Forget what I said
It's not what I meant
And I can't take it back
I can't unpack the baggage you left"

He hadn't touched Louis' stuff, couldn't bring himself to do it. He just couldn't. Louis had left the same night in tears, leaving all of his possessions with Harry in New York, before flying straight out to see his mum. He had never come back, the memories too sharp and painful.

"What am I now?
What am I now?
What if I'm someone I don't want around?"

He hates himself for what he's done.

"I'm falling again
I'm falling again
I'm falling
What if I'm down?
What if I'm out?
What if I'm someone you won't talk about?"

It's clear that Louis can't even stand the thought of him. And Harry doesn't even blame him. He can only dread what Louis would think if he knew the full truth, there's no way he would have agreed to a reunion then, let alone cried into Harrys arms.

"You said you cared
And you missed me. too"

The amount of times Harry had received calls from the rest of the boys regarding Louis was unreal. They had questioned and interrogated him, why had he left Louis? What had happened? But Harry would never give them a clear newer, just telling them it wasn't meant to be. He was so ashamed.

They told him how Louis wasn't coping, how he missed Harry. Harry just didn't understand the extent of it. Neither did they apparently.

"And I'm well aware I write too many songs about you
And the coffee's out
At the Beachwood Café
And it kills me 'cause I know we've run out of things we can say"

They can barely look at each other now, let alone talk.

He sings the chorus again before taking a breath and closing his eyes, singing the bridge.

"'And I get the feelin' that you'll never need me again"

Harry knows that he's been awful to Louis, and this time it's Liam who comforts Louis, helps him. Harry
just wishes it could be him. If he could take it all back he would.

He finishes the song with teary eyes, careful not to let them fall before the camera lights up red, indicating it's gone off. The interviewer can be heard again, sounding excited as she discusses the new song on air. It feels slightly surreal that this is going to be his last solo performance for a while, but he signed up to this, and he's going to make it work.

He stands up, removing the headset before exiting the stuffy room. He doesn't really pay attention to anything as he leaves, not the interviewer, not the other staff around. He's in his own little world.

As soon as they leave the tall building reality hits him, the boys all heard that, they were all listening back at Simons office, Harry was the last to have his interview today, Louis' wasn't until a few days later.

He sighs heavily and shakes his head as he gets into the black car, its arranged for him to go back there now and debrief. Time to face them.