Delicate

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"First floor on the south side, where you at?" Phone lights up my dashboard, I'm typing fast, "Come here, you can meet me in the back."

Pansy got out of her car, fingers flying across the keys. It was Saturday afternoon, which meant it was time to spend two hours volunteering at the local library. More importantly, though, she'd be seeing her co-volunteer, Penelope Gwin, again. From what it sounded like, Penelope was already inside, although waiting on the first floor rather than the ground floor.

By the time Pansy made her way across the parking lot and into the building, she could see Penelope coming at her from the opposite direction. She was wearing dark jeans and some Nikes, a purple iPad on her arm, headphones dangling down beside it, just like always.

Pansy couldn't look away, and already, a smile was spreading across her face. "Hey, Penelope."

"Hello, Dawn." Dawn was Pansy's last name, as well as her preferred name. Although she knew she was named after the flower, people who thought they were clever and funny liked to point out the other definition of the word "pansy" far too often for her to want to use it very much.

The two took their customary seats at one of the tables on the east half of the ground floor of the library. For library volunteers, they didn't actually do a lot of bookwork. It was mostly helping set up daily arts-n-crafts for the kids. But Dawn supposed that made sense. This was, after all, the children/youth/teen floor. While she and Penelope worked, it didn't take long for them to start chatting. That was one of the things Dawn found most amazing about their friendship. She wasn't a very extroverted person, and if Penelope was to be believed, nor was she. For some reason, though, they were chatty around each other.

At one point, in her excitement, Penelope leaned over to Dawn, so close that their noses were only inches apart. Penelope always did this whenever she was saying something she considered intense, important, or serious. Dawn only smiled. She didn't lean away. Even though she wouldn't have been comfortable with anyone else so close to her face, when it was Penelope, she found it amusing and endearing rather than creepy or annoying. She found herself distracted by Penelope's eyes. Oh damn, never seen that color blue. Look at all of the fun things that we do.

It wasn't exactly rocket science. Dawn knew that the reason Penelope felt so comfortable getting so close to her, and the reason Dawn was so comfortable in letting her, was because they liked each other. That was what friends were for. But, in some ways, maybe it was rocket science. For the life of her, Dawn still didn't know what Penelope saw in her, or why she seemed so comfortable around her.

I'm just a normal, boring, plain girl. I've got nothing interesting to show for myself. And Penelope and I don't even have THAT much in common...Sure, they both liked things like Minecraft and Hunger Games, and Penelope was trying to get her into Pokémon, but that was about it. Their entire friendship defied all expectation and explanation, and although there was nothing wrong with that, Dawn just wished she could understand it more.

This ain't for the best, my mental health has never been worse, so, you must like me for me. Seriously, why did Penelope like her? Dawn wasn't just boring, she was also...only barely staying afloat. Yeah, she was slogging her way through her junior year of high school; and yeah, she was trying to finally get her first (albeit part-time) job; and yeah, she was technically here at the library, volunteering for two hours every Saturday, but she was only tied together with a smile, so close to coming undone. And yet still, here was Penelope. Couldn't she sense how much was wrong with her co-volunteer? I didn't think I was that good at the poker face. What would she think and say and do if she knew the truth?

In her darkest times, Dawn sometimes wanted to end their friendship early. Not only did Dawn not want to bear the burden of pretending to be normal when she wasn't, she didn't want Penelope to have to bear the burden of putting up with her, especially if she wasn't even around forever. There were multiple reasons Dawn could think of that would eventually pull her away from Penelope, then it would be as if they never even met.

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