Be The Last To Kiss My Lips (COMPLETE)

Tyler's POV

Clayton would never guess how much he means to me. I had given up on life and even when I was alive, I wasn't living. Everything was messed up when I met him, I was in pain, both physical and emotional. My parents were heartbroken, my sister wouldn't even look at me once she learned that I tried to take my own life. Everything was crap. But Clay was the only one who made it feel less crap.

When I first saw him standing in the corridor, I thought damn! He was the most beautiful person I'd ever seen, tall, lean, handsome. My heart went crazy for him but of course I didn't dwell on that. My mom was in the other room crying and my sister gave me the most scared eyes as she demanded for an explanation. A stupid crush didn't matter in times like these. However, in a very long time, I was excited about something, about someone.

When my family avoided talking to me, Clay was there. He constantly checked up on me and comforted me when I needed it. I was finally feeling not alone. I felt like I had someone and he assured me I did.

Clayton was the best thing that has ever happened to me. And I've denied my feelings for long enough but I couldn't do it with Clay. I didn't want to over think it, I just wanted to be with him.

I didn't know if he wanted the same but he hasn't said otherwise so we were good.

Ruby and I visited him as much as we could at the hospital. It was really hard for both of us to see him like that. With the chemo, his hair fell off quicker than I imagined. He had gotten paler and thinner. I could feel my heart break just by looking at him, but I'd never let him see that.

We all tried to mask our feelings as best as we could. We'd come by, talk, watch movies, take walks, nap... Whatever, to take our minds off the cancer. Some days we'd oversleep, like today.

I woke up from the armchair I slept in to find Clay sitting in bed, staring at me. "Hi," I smiled.

He smiled back, "let's go for a walk."

We were walking in the empty corridor side by side. I offered to provide support or at least push the IV stand but Clay declined.

"I broke up with Olive." I told Clay. He didn't say anything. "I wanna be with you." I just put it out there.

He stopped dead in his tracks. A deafening silence filled the air for a while then he spoke, "I can't let you..." He trailed. His voice was as low as a whisper.

"What do you mean you can't let me?"

"Look at me Tyler, I'm sick-"

"And you'll get better!" I pointed out. He was quiet, "you don't believe that?"

He sighed, taking a seat on a bench. "No, I do." He avoided eye contact, "it's just that... Tomorrow's not promised for me-"

"Tomorrow's not promised for anybody!" I exclaimed. "Gimme another excuse, not this crap you're speaking." I snapped, "tell me you don't like me and I'll understand-"

"Ty, I know it's hard for you to see me like this-"

"Don't do this Clay. Don't." I begged.

"I'm sorry." He whispered.

My eyes stung with tears that welled up. But I refused to cry.

~

Our talk didn't affect how things were between us that much. There was a lot less gazing into each other's eyes now, just occasional blank stares now and then. I still visited him on a daily basis and continued giving him the support he needed.

The big day was here. The bone marrow transplant day. Everybody was here throughout the day and late at night Clay sent everyone home but I insisted on staying. Ruby would too but she had this big test tomorrow so she had to go home.

I was taking a nap on the armchair, I woke up to find Clay staring at me. He showed me a small smile and whispered, "come lay with me." I'd take that any day.

I lay with Clay on the small hospital bed and continued with sleeping. I didn't even question what this meant, you know, after that other conversation. I just cherished the moment.

He took my arm and wrapped it around his torso, and then placed his arm on top of mine. I got butterflies.

Later, I woke up to the sound of Clay throwing up. He was vomiting blood. Alarmed, I called the Nurse and she checked up on him. There wasn't much that she could do, she left and Clay continued throwing up for the rest of the night. He stopped at 4AM.

Even when he wasn't throwing up anymore, I stayed awake and alert, watching over him. When morning came, he seemed a bit better than the last few days. And I couldn't be happier.