Back on the highway, Catelyn sets her bow into the front of one of the abandoned cars. She is not going to sleep in that RV with them and she can't risk sleeping out in the open. So she opts for one of the other cars. So she is going to set up in the back of this empty one instead. That RV is a very small space and she is not about to get all cosy with these people. She lets out a breath and closes the front door behind she opens the back to climb in. From here, she can see the RV and she can see all around her, just in case anyone or anything were to get any ideas. She reaches over into the front seat and picks up her bow and quiver to pull it into her side of the car. Keeping it to hand. She lets out a breath and looks out of the car to where Daryl is doing a final sweep of the area before he heads into the RV. When the door to the RV closes, Catelyn lets out a breath and gets comfortable in the seat, pulling her legs up onto it as she sets her back against the door. She pulls her leather jacket from her bag to use as a pillow, it's going to be better than laying her head against the door for the rest of the night. She scrunches up the jacket and tucks it behind her head before she shifts slightly, resting her head back so she can stare up at the roof of the car and lets out a breath, fighting herself because her instinct is pushing for her to check on Marie, but she's not here so she's at a loss as to what to do with herself. She's not really tired. She doesn't want to sleep. She doesn't feel safe enough to sleep.
Catelyn leans back against the door, lifting her bag into her lap to rummage through it. She's looking for something specific, so she ignores all of the other items until she comes across what she wants. She takes a square military-style tin from her bag, pushing it away so she can set the tin in her lap to open it up. There are a number of personal items in this tin. Her old student pass. Tali's hospital band and butterfly hair clip. Marie's high school prom photo with Rick. Other photos. Photos of Marie and Catelyn. Tali. Catelyn and Tali. One of which she picks up. Of her and her little sister. This one literally taken the day before she died so Tali is five and Catelyn is fourteen. The last moments she spent with her sister. She is careful of this photo. And everything else in the box. Catelyn made sure she rescued some of their personal effects when they left. Photos and the other stuff. She wasn't willing to lose it for what they went through. Jack had already taken so much from them, and refused to allow any photos of Rick or Carl in the house, despite the fact they were Catelyn's family and Rick actually sent them, she even had things sent from Carl over the years, she saved what she could, but Jack destroyed everything else. They were lucky to save the prom photo of Rick, only managing it because Marie used to hide things in Catelyn's bedroom, under the floorboards knowing Jack wouldn't look for them there. Catelyn and Marie had used the photos rescued of Jack as kindling their first night in the wilderness after the outbreak. It was kind of therapeutic to burn them.
She sets the photo back into the tine before she pulls out a notebook and grabs a pen from the collection of them in her tin. She just picks them up as she goes. The notebook is a way to get everything out. Mostly she does it in the form of letters to Tali. It's stupid, but it's better than talking about it out loud, even if she could bring herself to voice what she's been through. She finds it easier writing it down and then burning the 'letter' afterwards. A way to get it all out. Not that that works. She still holds onto her anger and pain so tightly that most days she feels like it can choke her. She glances at the open tin, and stares at the photo of Tali. She is grateful that her sister isn't here. That Tali, as a ten-year-old, wouldn't be dealing with this world. She feels terrible for thinking that. That Tali is lucky, because she escaped the nightmares to come. She is grateful that Tali died when she did.
The door of the RV swings open causing her to look up to find Daryl as he leaves the RV again. Carol must still be crying. He glances over at the car seeing the flashlight beam she is using as she writes. She narrows her eyes against the light but he moves it just as quickly. He sits on the ground outside of the RV, knees brought up and his crossbow resting on the top of them. He's getting comfy for the night. Catelyn lets out a breath, cocking her head slightly as she watches him. Strange. She finds it strange the way she feels about these people. She and Marie have come across other survivors during their time since the outbreak, but she hated and distrusted them all, instantly. Whilst she played that part with these people, she didn't feel that with them. Well, she felt it with that Shane guy, she doesn't like him, but the others. She doesn't instantly want to kill them. And that is weird. She's gotten so used to feeling that way with the people they cross. Usually with good reason. She shakes her head and goes back to writing her letter. Her paranoia and her trauma are telling her not to trust these people. But she's starting to see what her mother saw in them. Even after a few hours. Even before even a day has passed. She doesn't want to make a mistake though. She doesn't want to give in and get hurt, again.
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(1) Vita Brevis (D. Dixon)
FanfictionThe end has come. And for Catelyn and her mother, that means holding up in an abandoned church but soon enough she is thrust into a survivors group that she has no interest in but sticks with for the sake of her mother and the surprise return of her...
