what the fuck

17

-We eat pizza from the inside out

-If will smith made the shot on the Fresh Prince, there would be no show.

-If you live to be 70 years old, you will have lived 10 years on a Monday

-Sometime in the future, someone will say your name for the last time

-deaf people don't understand why farts are funny

-Its not possible for wolverine to get circumcised

-when we go running, we wear special clothes that show we aren't running from or to somewhere

-How is it that vampires look so neat and pretty and tidy, if they can't see themselves in the mirror?

-If you drop an oreo, you can safely eat 2/3 of it.

-What does the mirror look like if we don't look at it?

-Technically all potatoes are mashed when eaten

-If you did something "Like a boss", you would just hire someone else to do it.

-Mothers get one day, but sharks get a whole fucking week

-Can Chewbacca even say his own name...? Shouldn't it be Raaaarrrrwrrrrr?

-Nothing is on fire, fire is on things.

-Nikola Tesla is best known for not being well known

-As Andy got older, his toys had to sit still and watch him masturbate...😮

-If you're the oldest person in the world, the entire population has changed before your very eyes.