Shattered Shenanigans

13: Practice Makes Prime

The contacts agitated his optics. And yes, his optics did start watering.

"Aw, must really not like your attire?" Knockout teased.

"The contacts-"

"I know, I'm just playing." Knockout smirked and headed out, "May I present to you-" Knockout started loudly.

Oh no, not a public display

"Ssppp." Knockout started, "Get over here!"

"The paint's still wet." Optimus lied.

"Argh, he looks terribly good, if you're wondering." He said before walking back in, "The paint's dry!" He started.

"Still feels wet." Optimus muttered as Soundwave came in with Megatron.

"Argh." Megatron started.

"What do you mean, 'argh'?" Knockout started.

"Never mind." Megatron muttered.

"'Argh' just about sums it up." Soundwave muttered. "Now, all we have to do is get evil Optimus of his ship without anyone knowing and sneak nice Optimus on the ship-"

"We need to know where the ship is." Megatron nodded. "How do we find it?" He asked.

"They're normally just inside the Earth's atmosphere- so at the moment the best way to find it would be open optic exploration." Soundwave said.

"Drive around the Earth and look at the sky?" Optimus asked.

"I was going to suggest having Starscream and Dreadwing fly around Earth." Soundwave said. "We could also ask Agent Fowler to patch us into satellite imagery. And have Rafael monitor it."

"Alright- how do we get 'evil' Optimus off his ship?" Megatron asked.

"Well, what worked for me." Optimus started. "Challange him to a one on one." He said.

"You had a one on one with evil Megatron?" Soundwave asked.

"I broke onto his ship, patched into the ships coms and publicly called him out." Optimus explained.

"Well, we'll have to be more subtle- so the 'bots won't be confused when they find 'Optimus' on the ship when he's supposed to be off the ship." Soundwave said.

"Do you have his personal com?" Optimus asked.

"No." Megatron said.

"But, we have your com." Soundwave said and pointed at Optimus, "If you disable your com, it's likely we'll just end up hooked to the next available com- his com." Soundwave explained.

"Now that that's out of the way." Megatron started, "Starscream, Dreadwing!" He called.

"Yes sir?" Dreadwing asked as he shot to his side, Starscream took his damn time. Once he finally got there, Megatron started issuing orders.

"Now all we have to do is work on your 'evil' attitude." Soundwave said. "Knockout and Breakdown enjoy some roleplay and Megatron knows evil Optimus better than anyone." Soundwave started.

"Hmpf." Optimus started.

"Oh wait!" Megatron started, "He needs treads to cover his wheels-"

"And tank barrels to cover his exhaust stack." Soundwave finished, "Yea, I'll make it."

-

-

Two hours later, they were still sitting on crates- save Starscream and Dreadwing. Optimus was slightly uncomfortable with the minor edits Soundwave made to his frame.

"No no," Jack started, "Puff out you chassis more-"

"Yea! You don't look egotistical right now!" Miko added.

Optimus tried to follow their instructions.

"Now you look like you swallowed a frog." Fowler pointed out.

"Argh- try to look more prideful." Megatron started, "And add a sneer that says 'I'm better than everyone here'." He added.

It was rather hard to seem prideful while sitting so Optimus just crossed over a leg and crossed his arms, then adding a unnatural sneer. Actually, now hat he looked at himself, evil Optimus was a lot like his Megatron. He added a bored expression to his sneer.

"Perfect!" Knockout started. "Now try standing up!"

Optimus kept his expression and stood up before putting his servos behind his back- now he looked like he was judging everyone, great.

"That's actually believable." Jack muttered, Optimus snapped his optics over at him and surveyed him with a somewhat disgusted expression. Maybe that was too much?

"Woo! I have goose bumps!" Miko started while Breakdown nodded.

"Now, lets pretend someone made a offensive comment-" Megatron started.

"Me! Me! Me!" Knockout started, waving his servo in the air.

"Yes-"

"Ahhhhhh, I dunno what to say." Knockout started, "Hey- stupid-"

Optimus added a sneer and took a aggressive step towards him while flexing his servos- perhaps that was too expressive. He felt cringy.

It seemed to work though, Knockout hid behind Breakdown.

"Is evil Optimus a bit sarcastic?" Optimus asked.

"Yes." Megatron nodded.

"Then he's a lot like the Megatron in my dimension." Optimus concluded. "I just need to act like evil Megatron." He added.

"And you can do that?" Fowler asked.

Optimus nodded hesitantly. He might accidently apologise for aggressive actions but yes, he can do it. "Yup." He forced out. He knew Megatron inside and out.

"Guys!" Raf started as he ran over, clutching his computer.

"Did you-" Jack started.

"I found it!"

"The ship?" Soundwave asked and got up, walking over to the monitor. "Well done!" Soundwave probably would have patted him on the back if that wouldn't risk hospitalizing the human. "Megatron-"

"We're doing it now?" Megatron asked.

"Yes, we've prepared everything, nice Optimus is connected to our com system-" Soundwave started, "I'm going to bridge you out to the set location-"

"Okay, okay. Bridge Starscream and Dreadwing back first." Megatron instructed and Soundwave did so.

"What's going on?" Starscream asked as the walked through.

"We found the ship, you go with Megatron- don't be seen, you're just back up." Soundwave instructed. Optimus started wondering who here was in charge. Soundwave opened a bridge and they hurried through.

Optimus perked up a bit, realising they were doing this just for him to get home. The com was silent for a bit until Megatron lowly said, "He's here."

Soundwave nodded, "Keep your com open." He instructed and set in new coordinates, "Ready?" He asked.

Not really no, "Yes." Optimus said and straightened up, "Thank you-"

"You can thank me whent his is done." He said and opened the bridge, Optimus wasted no time and walked though.

He looked around and was surprised to see the Nemesis looked the same. Then he realised he can't transform without blowing his cover. Great.