Strangers ~ Conrad Fisher

fourteen

TW: mention of ED.

Jere and Steven decided to drive the deb girls back, belly and cam went back inside, and Conrad went for a surf.

I sat on the beach and thought of last night.

Over the years I realized that Nicole and the other girls were right. And now Adam proved that too. No one wanted to be with the fat girl.

Now, being with someone who is bigger than you is deemed embarrassing, though it shouldn't be because they are no different than everybody else.

Even though I was over 70 lbs down, I still felt the same about myself. Sometimes I still think I look the same, despite that i went from a size 12 to a size 4.

Now I knew why Conrad didn't want to go with me, it wasn't because he thought it was stupid. He just didn't want to embarrass himself, given the chance that someone would see. It could ruin his rep.

Girls were all over conrad, pretty ones. He'd take any of them over me any day.

I just didn't want to believe it. He could never like me, even now.

After that summer, I went home feeling like shit. I started to eat less and workout more.

I woke up feeling horrible, but all I could think of is what everyone would think of me if I lost weight. I'd have the life I've always wanted.

My mom would take me to do more things, I could go shopping with my friends without feeling embarrassed to try on clothes, and I could have a boyfriend. Something I've always wanted.

I hoped it would be Conrad. After all, we were the oldest. First born, Susannah used to always joke about us getting married. I wanted that to be my reality.

Now I knew that that would never happen. 

I had been losing weight rapidly, soon I wasn't even able to get up and walk around. My parents noticed and took me to the hospital, where I was admitted for a few months.

I was so upset with myself because I wasn't able to go to cousins with the rest of them. My dad even had to take time off his job to be able to take care of me while my mom was gone.

One day Conrad had texted me asking why I wasn't coming. I didn't know what to tell him.

"I'm really sick. I don't know when I'll be able to come." I told him.

He responded back, "you know how dramatic that is. Everyone gets sick V."

Not even a "how are you?" or an "I hope you feel better."

I answered back. "Fuck you conrad. Ask your mom why I'm not coming. Don't text me."

I had expected him to apologize, but he never did.

I got better a while after, but realized that none of my friends had texted me at all, besides jere.

I went back to school after the summer and made new friends. We'd sneak out and go smoke, i started to go to parties. I started to care less. We're all gonna die anyways, so why not die having fun?

As the months went by, i gained lots of friends and a lot more guys started to talk to me, but nothing from conrad, the person who i actually wanted to talk to me.

Soon i got up, stumbling, walking back up to the house.
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Conrad's pov-

"Ohhh sea creature, where are youuuuu?" I heard Vic slur.

"I'm in the showerrr." I answered back. Was she drunk?

"There you are." She said. "I need to ask you a question." She said while poking my wet chest.

"I'm showering can you give me a second?" I asked looking down at her.

"I know why you didn't want to take me to the ball." She slurred.

I looked at her confused. "What?"

"You didn't take me because I was ugly. I don't blame you, I was super fat. No one would want to go with a pig like me." She laughed.

I looked at her speechless. I hated how she was talking about herself. "What are you talking about? You weren't ugly. Pig? V, you're drunk. Go lay down."

I saw tears form in her eyes. "It's okay, I get it. I would have taken Nicole too. You could never like me how you like her."

My heart dropped. Is that really what she thought?

"I wouldn't want to embarrass you, having to go with someone like me."

I looked at her disappointed. "V, that's not true. Stop saying that." I turned off the water and grabbed my towel. I wanted to hold her. I reached for her but she pulled away.

"Don't feel bad. I understand." She said trying to give me a smile, despite the tears trickling down her face.

I watched as she walked away back into the house. I can't believe she thought that. I didn't know what to do.

As the night went on, I couldn't stop thinking about earlier. It was dark now, the fireworks were gonna start soon. I walked down to the dock and stood against the railing.
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Vic's pov-
I woke up feeling better. The pounding in my head had gone away and I felt like I could get up and go downstairs to eat.

Then I remembered what I had said to Conrad. Shit. Im never drinking again.

I fixed myself a bowl of cereal when I got downstairs. My mom walked in. She looked happy, different than normal.

"Where were you?" I asked.

She jumped, "Jesus V you scared me. I was out with Susannah."

"Oh okay." I said getting up. I walked outside and saw Conrad standing on the dock. I decided to go down to try and fix things.

I came up beside him and rested on the railing like he was. "So, does everyone hate me now?" I asked looking out at the water.

He looked at me. "Who could ever hate you?"

"I'm sorry about the whole ball thing, I shouldn't have brought it up." I apologized.

"No it's okay, I never meant for you to feel that way, I didn't say no because of that." He said looking at me.

I looked up at him.

"V, you don't know the affect you have on people." He said softly.

"Affect? I don't know what you mean." I said confused.

He looked down and placed one of his hand on my waist.

"Conrad-"

He looked back up at me and got closer. He leaned in and our faces were centimeters away. If we were any closer we'd be kissing.

Suddenly a firework exploded in the air, both of us pulling away. We both looked out at the water saying nothing.