Jonathan

IX

"This is nice, you are nice" said the beautiful girl.

"I thought you were avoiding me, that's why I stayed away"

"I found someone special, I thought the right thing was to tell you, I wouldn't want you to hear it from someone else"

"From someone else? From Lavinia do you mean? Either way Lotty, I can't believe you even think I'll find any truth in those words" Jonathan responded smiling.

"If you are telling me this, it is because you need something from me, am I wrong?"

"Very well, I want to marry him" Charlotte said firmly.

Jonathan started to laugh and nodded his head negatively as he looked away towards the colorful flower beds.

"It's going to be a nice day, the clouds are no longer grey. I thought it was a mistake to ask me for breakfast here, but now I can see why. With lastnight's storm you thought there will be nobody around here this morning"

Jonathan turned and looked back into her eyes.

"I already saved you from a pretty bad arrangement, I made it pretty clear before, I would not help you again, why do you want to torture me like this?"

"Oh Jonathan, please, I am not trying to torture you in any way just because you abandoned me when I needed you the most, this time is serious. I know you may find that hard to believe, but he's a good man and I love him" Charlotte spoke convinced.

"I did not abandon you to begin with, you said I made you too sad and I could never make you happy so..."

"So nothing!" Charlotte interrupted.

"You are missing the whole point here!" she continued.

"Look, sweetheart, I don't want to fight with you, not with you. If there was any truth in what you are saying about this person I'd do everything to give you what you want and you know that, truly. Look at me and tell me otherwise. But we both know your taste in men it's pretty much as good as my baking skills, so if you put your mind to it, you will really see that for yourself, this is another mistake" Jonathan said in frustration.

"That's that include you?"

"What?"

"The bad taste in men, of course"

Charlotte recovered her composure and with elegance took her cup up to her lips.

"Of course it does" he said.

Then they both laughed as if no time passed between the playful times they shared as children and this moment. But the smiles slowly vanished from their faces and a nostalgic air wrapped them in an instant. That would be the longing for the past that never was or perhaps the future that would never be lived. It was the combination of both. The truth was that Charlotte was probably the first woman he ever loved, if he ever fell in love with a woman at all. They grew up together, she was just one year younger, same as Ben, everybody assumed they will make a good couple, the best match. But that was nothing further from the truth. Of course Lavinia tolerated the attention he gave Charlotte, and even told her how to make him do what she wanted, but truly Lavinia just played them both, not like they didn't know, but Lavinia's ability to manipulate people were of another world. She made of a teenage innocent romance a misery, but to her surprise that brought them closer together and they ended up falling in love.

Charlotte was nothing like Lavinia, her passion, her innocence, her free spirit would never allow her to live a life that was borrowed, she wanted it all, because she gave it all. More than once she tried to move on from her first love by choosing the worst possible candidates, sadly she truly believed she loved them and that they were great men, but that was her tragedy, she always picked the worst ones. Usually with no title or position, such a marriage for someone of her status would never get a royal approval, Jonathan paid them off more than once and even almost helped one to gain a proper status to marry her. Her brown wavy hair, the big green eyes and that charming smile made anyone melt, her body was never still, if she wasn't dancing, she would move, hug, kiss. The children particularly adored her. Her waist highlighted her curvy figure.

Jonathan would do anything to protect her, but maybe he was already giving up, tired of it, thinking that there was not much more to be done than just let her be, but he was sure of one thing, he would not contribute to her ruin.

"You know what, your highness? You never really ask for anything, not for love, not for an explanation, not even just simply to stay. And that only hurts even more, to know you want me to do all those things, but would not dare to ask. Why?"

Charlotte inquired not expecting an answer.

Jonathan stood up and bent to kiss her hair as he put his left hand on her left shoulder and walked away. It was still quite early and it suddenly turned chillier. His dark hair was reached by the wind, clearing up his face completely as he turned to enter to the building again. She didn't think she'll turn to look back at him leaving, but she did, just at that very moment to see his face, his distinctive profile as he slightly closed the eyes for the breeze and climbed up the few steps that will lead him to the entrance.
It was then when she realized it was all a charade. She even felt betrayed by the fact that she tried to fool herself once more, thinking a new happy life could be granted to her, but one honest instant of looking at that man, knocked all the pieces down.

"I still love him..."