Story of a Failed Writer

Part 12- Hey, Nice to Meet You. READ MY STORY NOW!

I haven't updated for I while because I've been busy... frankly I've been quite lazy for that matter... You know this was only supposed to be three parts long...

This part is dedicated to Pinkberry for the awesome idea! Merci!

~SS

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Part 12- Hey, Nice to Meet You. READ MY STORY NOW!

Apparently, now the computer now has a new fancy auto-recover feature (take THAT technology). So your story was really never gone. All that crying for nothing. Oh well, back to writing!

After hours and hours of writing, you're halfway done the story. After posting some of it you realize that no one knows it exists. It has votes, but not enough to get you onto the hot list. A light dings. Not a regular 'ol light bulb, one of those bright neon signs that you can't help but look at. One that says "BAM I got a damn good idea right here!" Okay... maybe it was only as bright as a regular 'OPEN' sign, but, hey, got to start somewhere.

What do you see on TV? Ads.

What do you see in magazines? Ads.

What do you see on billboards? Advertisements.

What do you see... okay I think you get the point.

You devise a (not so) awesome plan: Step 1- Search up random people, preferably ones who don't have a gazillion and two fans and can't be bothered to respond to any message. Was that so easy? No. No, of course not. Of course the computer has to try to take revenge and put a virus in one of the links on a profile (the link looked so shiny...) and you had to open it (it was SHINY-LOOKING!). Everything has to be difficult with you, doesn't it?

Anyways, once step one was done (okay maybe it wasn't that  shiny...), step two commences. You simply say stuff like "Hey cool name. Read my story?" and "Yo! Wassup homedog. Check out my tight writing?" Oh, and of course "I feel your pain. The sun is way too bright. The darkness is defiantly superior. Oh and that vampire dude was sooo hot. Hey, I think you'd like my story, vamp buddy." All of this actually took up more time than writing the actual story.

Ha! You thought you saw threatening comments before. You find that many writers are very...creative with their cussing when bothered with annoying, shameless, self-promotion. Some of those people looking for 'friends' in the online writing world actually read and comment on your story. You're so happy.

But what would this story be if you didn't fail? You're in a creative/mad mood. You decide to make up even fancier cusses at the people who cussed at you. Turns out that you're probably better at swearing than actual writing. Go figure. What you don't realize is that the people who cussed deleted their comments. So when you used your expertise to put delightfully threatening messages on people's walls, you got, oh, well, about, twenty-seven reports. No, of course your account wasn't closed down. (You should know that was said with very heavy sarcasm. Of course it was shut down for, what is it now... the third time?)

Until next fail!