I saw him

Entry 1

It all started on my first day of college*. Leon and I explored the library during lunch before returning to our respective forms. Before we left with our loaned books, I casually glanced at the two boys in the same room: one who looked similar to Rick Astley and the one next to him: Whose sky blue hoodie and cloud fluffy hair I can't get out of my head.

Casually, I was hoping that one of them would be in my classes, but mainly the hoodie boy. At the same time, I assumed he'd be more of a sciences and maths guy since he seemed like someone who'd take those subjects. As for me, I was mainly taking social sciences and arts subjects, which is far from being in the same universe as him (probably? I mean, I don't know what subjects he takes). Unfortunately, that was not the case. I'm glad that he wasn't in any of my lessons. If he were, I'd probably end up feeling self-conscious about myself like I do whenever I'm near any guy I crush on. Although I saw him around college with his excellent choice of hoodies, both of us personally do not know each other, nor know that we both exist (well, he doesn't know I exist). Within a few months, I forgot about him and his k-pop idol-like features, only seeing him as a human who simply walks around.

HOWEVER ONE DAY, I was at the train station. It was a normal day when I was waiting for the train to arrive. After hours of college lessons, going home and thinking about random things was on my list. Once the train slid to my platform,

I saw him.

I saw his soft brown locks of hair and his shiny brown eyes glittering from afar. He walked along the platform in a comfortable grey hoodie, entering through the back coach of the tube. Instead of entering into the same coach and feeling like a creep for seeing him, I lowered my gaze into the next coach (due to the conflicts of religion and my feelings), where his existence was non-existent (oof). Yes, instead of wasting my time admiring his looks like the superficial being I seem to be, I have chosen to waste my time thinking about him. But then I realised something. How the heck are we on the same train? Is this destiny or simply pure coincidence?

Staring at the train window, I wondered which town his stop was. Now, my life brought me more questions: Does the dude live near me? Will we be on the same train as each other again? Deep inside, I was hoping that he would stop at my town. Sadly, I didn't see him. Either he left the previous station or lives one or two towns away. Wherever he lived was not my business. I felt like a creep for thinking about it. Yet, I wonder what would happen if we did actually live in the same town. I haven't seen him on my platform, or even at the station so he probably moved to a new location, or he takes another train that departs from a different platform but somehow decided to take the other train maybe because it was cancelled. Before that day, I never noticed him in the station. And from this day, I start seeing him.

After that event, I lightly forgot about him. Even though I looked side to side for his presence the following week, nothing felt significant (totally).
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* = college in the UK just means 11th-12th grade. British people just call it sixth form/sixth form college