Stigma || KTH

05 In Denial

  They all sat down on the couch in the living room and they were waiting Seokjin to tell them what Iori told him about Taehyung's condition.
  "So, she basically said that by your symptoms and actions she diagnosed you with bipolar disorder." Seokjin told them.
  "That's it?" Yoongi asked.
  "Depression because of your grandparents' death. Anxiety because of the stress you get randomly, in addition to the fact that you can't sleep because of your insomnia and because of the panic attacks. And finally possible trust issues since you only have us so it's really hard for you to trust anyone else." Seokjin said.
  "She can only give him antidepressants just to alleviate the pain he expierences and talk to him so he can have an expert to talk to, that's all she can do. That's everything she told me." Seokjin finished. There were a lot of things for a 25 year old guy who seems normal.
  "So she basically can't cure him." Jungkook said.
  "No one can. There's no cure."
  "Tell me somethimg I don't know." Taehyung murmured annoyed.
  "What was that?" Seokjin asked Taehyung confused.
  "I already had told you about these things years ago. She did nothing, it's like I never went there! Good thing the first appointent is free." he said pissed.
  "Taehyung you had to go so we can be su-" Jungkook started but Taehyung left without letting him finish his sentence.
  "Taehyung!" Namjoon yelled but the only response they received was the loud noise of Taehyung's door slamming.
  "I'll go." Jimin said and stood up. The rest stayed silent.

***

  I stepped inside Taehyung's room and I saw him laying down on his bed with the blanket covering his whole body. I approached the bed and shook him to notice my presence.
  "Get out of my room." he said without moving a muscle.
  "You know I won't." He sighed and stood up to face me. His hair was messy and he was sniffing his nose.
  I sat down on his bed and petted his head. "It's okay, don't worry about it. It's just the start, it was your first appointment." I said softly and continued to pet his head.
  "Do I even want to go again?" he asked himself and my smile faded.
  "Wasn't the psychologist good to you?" I asked him. "No, it's not that. I liked her a lot but the only thing I was thinking about during the dialogue with her was her on the floor dead, with blood around her body." he said without looking at my eyes, probably disappointed.
  "Taehyung no! Not the hallucinations again!" I said. "You know it's not something I can handle." he said with a low, sad voice in the verge of tears.
  "And that's the reason we sent you for psychotherapy!" I yelled at him pissed and he started crying.
  "Hey Tae, please don't cry." I told him when I realised what I did while rubbing his back since I could't wipe his wet cheeks.
  "Did you tell her anything about the murders?" I asked and I felt him shook his head.
  "I thought if I would tell her she would give me to the cops." he said between his tears and I said okay.
  "C'mon get up to eat dinner." he got up and hugged me. I hugged him tightly and when we broke the hug I looked at him and made a silly face to make him laugh and I obviously succeeded, earning a chuckle by him. We then left the bedroom.

***

  Jin left my office and I sighed. I already know that something is off with Taehyung but I'll just wait for him to open up more.
  It was a big step for him to open up that much to a stranger, even if I'm a professional.
  It was late and I finished work so I left my office. I bowed to my receptionist and she said she will lock the office for me and I thanked her.
  I stepped in my car and drove all the way to the apartment I share with my older sister. I parked the car to the garage and went inside the elevator. I pressed the button to the fourth floor where my apartment is and the elevator went up.
  I stepped out and found the apartment 42 which is mine. I put the key in the keyhole and opened the door.
  "I'm home!" I shouted to my sister. She came from the kitchen and hugged me.
  "How was work?" she asked me. "I had a difficult customer today." I said and threw my bag on the couch and sat down because I was exhausted. She sat beside me. "How come?" she asked curious.
  "Well he has bipolar disorder. He lost his grandarents and it seems like they meant a lot to him which led him to depression. He has hallucinations, suicidal tendencies, mood swings, poor concentration, panic attacks, insom- " I told her and her but she stopped me.
  "Hold on, there's an actual person with all these symptoms?" she asked me and I simply nodded my head.
  "Yeah, I feel really sorry for him, he has some type of trauma too and that's probably what started all this." I said in a sad tone.
  "Oh my, you should keep an eye on him more. Was it his first appointment?" she asked me. "Yes and probably the last. I don't think he liked me that much." I said still sad.
  "C'mon silly, don't say that. You are a great person and a great doctor. I think he liked you but he is just shy." she said and brushed my hair with her fingers. "I hope so." I said and we both smiled.
  "I prepared pasta, do you want some?" she asked me and I shook my head. "I want to sleep." I said and she nodded.
  "Alright." she told me. We both stood up so we can go to our seperate bedrooms.
  "Goodnight Iori."
  "Goodnight Ayaka."