Chapter 30

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Shut off

"Can I go in now?" I asked him again. Pangatlong tanong ko na ito simula kanina. Hindi niya ako hinahayaang umalis kahit ilang beses ko nang sinubukan.

"Let's grab a cup of ice cream first?" subok niya na naman.

A small smile curved on my lips. Pabiro ko siyang inirapan. 

"I really want to go in now, love."

He tilted his head a bit while staring at me carefully. His shoulders slumped.

"But you're not okay," he said.

"Oo, pero... kaya ko naman. I appreciate your concern, though. Sobra." Nanliit ang mga mata niya, mukhang hindi pa rin kumbinsido. "In-expect ko na ang nangyari kaya hindi na ganoon kasakit."

He snorted. 

"Hindi ganoon kasakit, huh? Is that why you look like you've been bitten by a huge bug?"

Nanlaki ang mga mata ko. Did he just say I look like I've been bitten? 

"Nakakainis ka, ah!" Hinampas ko ang braso niya.

He really knows how to tease me— make me forget for a while, too. 

He smirked then after a few seconds, the worry on his face returned. 

"Tell me once you're ready, okay?"

"Yup."

Humakbang ako para mapalapit lalo sa kaniya bago siya niyakap. I felt his arms envelope me like protecting me from everything that could hurt me.

I hope an embrace can do that. Kung ganoon lang, baka hindi na ko bumitaw mula sa yakap niya. I'll stay in between his arms for as long as I can.

"I love you, Tali," he said.

Sinagot ko iyon bago bumitaw. 

I can't stay in between his arms forever. I still have to let go even if I don't want to. 

I waved my hand at him before going inside. Pagpasok ko, nadatnan ko si Brielle na tutok sa cellphone niya. Nakaupo siya sa kama niya, mukhang stressed.

She turned to me immediately and stood up when she saw me.

"Okay ka lang ba?" nag-aalalang tanong niya. 

Worry is etched on her face. Malamig din ang kamay niya na nakahawak sa kanang kamay ko.

I sighed, not having the energy to answer that question again.

"Tali." She hugged me. "It's okay. Don't answer it."

Matagal niya akong yakap bago niya ako pinakawalan.

"Nag-dinner ka ba?" tanong niya.

"Oo, ikaw?"

Tumango siya. "Ligo ka na tapos pahinga ka na."

"Thank you, Brie."

She smiled. "I'm here, ah?"

I nodded before going inside the bathroom with my towel. My face in the mirror welcomed me.

Akala ko exaggerated lang na parang kinagat ng malaking bubuyog ang mga mata ko. Vixen's right. Singkit ang mata ko kaya dahil sa pamamaga parang linya na lang ito. My nose is red, too, as well as my cheeks.

I sighed and stopped staring at my reflection. I don't want to hate the way I look, too. Ayaw ko nang dagdagan. 

Matagal bago ako nakatulog noong gabing iyon. I was just staring at the window. Hindi ako umiyak pero habang tumatagal na gising ako, pabigat ng pabigat ang dibdib ko.

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