𝒫𝓇ℴ𝓁ℴ𝓰𝓊ℯ

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Hi, my name is Lily Simons and I'm sick of this shit. Maybe I'll start from the beginning.

When I was 20 I joined x Factor. At first I was a soloist, but towards the end I was the worst member of Sweets. Wondering how?

Surely everyone knows the story of one direction, our story is similar. I was grouped with three girls: Katy, Stephanie, and Daisy. They were all sweet and nice and so the word "were" is important.Unfortunately we won. Why unfortunately? Because from that day on, I became more and more depressed.

So after our victory, we signed a contract for three years. We had to leave Great Britain and move to Los Angeles. I started to have doubts, don't get it wrong, of course I wanted to start my career and see LA but on the other hand it means that for at least three years I will hardly see my family, including my little brother Tommy. This kid is everything to me. I love him with all my heart.

After talking to the whole family, I came to the conclusion that I should sign this document. So I did it.

Everything was perfect at first. Girls were like sisters to me.

My nightmare began when the first magazine wrote about us. I have been described as a group leader. Of course that wasn't true. After this incident, the girls started laughing at me that I would never be the leader of anything, that I was their weakest member. I had low self-esteem since I was a child, so I believed them. I started getting more and more depressed. Our manager seemed to avoid problems, and worst of all I felt he agreed with the girls.

During our first tour, the girls came up with the idea to nickname us a color. Each color represents each girl's personality. So Katy is red (sexy and dangerous), Stephany is green (happy and kind), Daisy is pink (innocent and sweet) and I am blue, which means depression and sadness.

Time flew, I got fewer and fewer lyrics, I was in the background in the music video. Even our fans forget me from time to time.

After these three years, I was just a shadow of my old self.

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