Regulus is complicated. It isn't that James is completely lost, he has been friends with Sirius since he was eleven. But it's...different. Regulus does come back, the night after Halloween, but he brings the telescope and holds himself apart from James. They talk, it's nice, but it's...stilted. Regulus never lets either of them get too close, doesn't laugh too loud, doesn't say anything important.
James wants to talk about it—about Marlene, about Regulus's reaction, about how they can be more careful in the future. But he's met with silence. With an unreadable expression. With empty eyes.
They don't touch. Which is okay, except James doesn't know what's allowed here—what Regulus wants. Where the boundaries are. Regulus keeps coming back, just like always, he smiles at James and it feels like he means it. But he keeps the walls up and the mask on, and sometimes James feels like maybe they're just good friends. Hell, maybe they're just acquaintances. And that—that hurts more than he would have expected.
It's just...it had felt big. Whatever was happening between them. It had felt like standing on the precipice of something and now...now James is just...waiting.
"Aw, brilliant," Sirius says as he tears into another package from his uncle. James doesn't miss the way he carefully folds the accompanying letter and slips it into his pocket. He knows how much this means to Sirius, having someone that's his. Knows that there's part of him that wants to keep it that way, sharing some of it with the three of them but keeping the rest for himself.
"Moony, verdict?"
Sirius turns the muggle record around so that Remus can see it on the other side of the table.
Remus looks up from his breakfast, smiling as much at Sirius's excitement as he is at the record.
"No way—I've been looking for that Fleetwood album for ages!"
Sirius preens and James quickly ducks his head, trying to hide his own smile. He was worried at first, but so far it's been really good, this thing with his uncle. The impromptu pranking has certainly been on the decline. Which James is a fan of, if for no other reason than he hates being left out.
"You've got a free period in the afternoon yeah? We can listen to it if you want?"
Remus blinks, forkful of egg missing his mouth, "Ah—yeah, sure, yeah. We can do that."
"Cool," Sirius nods, eyes already back on the track list.
Without meaning to—or maybe completely meaning to—James finds himself searching the Slytherin table. Gaze stopping at the sight of dark curls and grey eyes. Regulus is sitting with Crouch and Rossier, smirking at something one of them said, looking every inch the Black prince he's supposed to be. It's hard sometimes, making the two versions of him fit together in James's head. He'll see Regulus in the halls and he won't even recognize him. It's a bit frightening if he's being honest.
"Morning," Lily slides into the seat beside James, jolting him out of his thoughts and nearly making him choke on his breakfast in the process.
All four Marauders turn to stare at her in mild shock as she starts filling up her plate.
Peter leans over towards Remus and very loudly whispers; "has James finally imperiused her?"
James scowls at him while Sirius barely keeps it together beside him.
"Problem?" Lily asks, taking a bite of her toast like this is the most natural thing in the world.
While James knows for a fact that he hasn't imperiused Lily, he is not at all certain that somebody else hasn't.
