UNBREAKABLE

Chapter 7

"YOU'RE COMING BACK, RIGHT?" Avery's eyes were in tears. She hadn't let go of my hand since we left the dance hall's parking lot. I nodded because I couldn't find the words to say. My tears wouldn't stop falling too. Everything in my body was numb except my heart. It felt like someone had broken it into a gazillion pieces.

I couldn't describe the pain I was feeling. No dictionary could give the exact term, not even a synonym. It was a mixture of excruciating pain, hurt, and loss. Today I didn't just lose my grandmother. I lose a piece of my heart. I realized I had also lost Art; it was like my heart had stopped beating.

When we arrived at Logan, Avery's parents were waiting for us. Finally, a few minutes after, my mom came. Our combined tears and words of comfort and love from Avery's family filled the less than two hours of waiting for our boarding time.

"Don't worry about anything here. We will take care of your house and all." Auntie Beth was hugging my mom on our way to our boarding gate.

Avery locked her hand to mine as we followed them. "I'll clean your room and update you about everything."

Our grip on each other's hand tightened as we reached the boarding gate. Tears started falling again. When I looked at our mothers, they were no different. Avery's dad watched the four of us. When we said our final goodbyes, Avery handed me my cell phone.

"It's on silent mode. Then, when you're on the plane and feel like checking...." She squeezed my hand. "He sent you multiple messages and missed calls."

I smiled and hugged her again. "I'm going to miss you, Ave."

Avery patted my back and whispered, "Promise me you're coming back, Shells. Love you!'

"Love you, too!" I pulled away and hugged her parents goodbye. As my mom and I entered the gate, we waved to all of them. "Let's have video calls, okay?" Avery nodded while wiping her tears.

When my mom and I sat on the plane, I felt as if my body had undergone a whole-body workout for a full day. I felt my mom's arm pull me towards her when I started sobbing.

"It's going to be fine, sweetie. I know how sad you're feeling now because of grandma."

I let my tears fall, and my body trembled. How could I explain to my mom that I couldn't differentiate sadness from pain?

***

After almost twenty hours, including two layovers, our plane landed in Manila. My mom and I took a cab to my grandparents' ancestral home in Quezon City. It was a new experience for me. According to my mom, it was my second time coming. But I couldn't remember anything since I was still a baby when we first visited.

My thoughts on Art and what happened after the dance halted when we arrived at my grandmother's wake. It wasn't the usually quiet and intimate wake I'm used to in Boston. Instead, it was a never-ending introduction and meeting with my dad's side of the family. I was surprised to get acquainted with multiple cousins, aunties, uncles, grandfathers, and grandmothers. It was a week of prayers from noontime to late afternoon, unlimited games, and food from night to early morning.

For a short period, I freed myself from the life I had left behind.

Since we left Boston, I only texted Avery one message telling her we were okay and assuring her that I would video call her once my grandmother's remains were buried. I didn't even mention to her that I decided not to check Art's messages and instead deleted them.

Meeting another side of my family gave me a reason to focus on the positive. As my newly met cousins told me, in the Philippines, a relative's death most of the time became a family reunion of sorts. So my mom and I used the time to spend with them. She told me that since my grandmother was the last one alive in my dad's immediate family, it might be possible that it'll be the last time we'd get the chance to come to Manila.