❧ fifty-three

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"So... tell me how you've been," Daniela said with a smile as she sat down next to me.

I returned her smile and wrapped my hands around the warm mug of coffee. "I've been okay. Up and down, but at the moment I'm content."

Days passed and it had been a week since Arthur announced the store would be closed for good. I was there when he signed the contracts, so he wouldn't have to do it on its own. I helped with the last couple of things that needed to be taken care of. Royden offered to help carry heavy boxes, so he was over a lot too, despite my protests about his side.

It was completely healed, bandages taken off, but he still needed to be careful. He didn't listen and went back to work immediately, going to the main office and even had a mission already. I warned him about it, how it could tear and get infected. I still worried immensely about him whenever I was off to help Arthur or when he was at the main office, but I couldn't hold him back.

And I was doing better. Nightmares and bad dreams still haunted my nights, but it was getting better with Royden by my side. I was less exhausted yet the constant concern and fear I carried with me, something I would never tell Royden, was stressing me.

"Glad you're doing fine. It's been a couple weeks since I've seen you. You should come over more often, sweetie," Daniela replied with a slight grin.

"I know..." I trailed off while looking at my coffee. "It's just been a couple of chaotic weeks. That's all."

"Chaotic weeks? You didn't tell me that over the phone."

A soft sigh escaped my lips. I knew I should have told Daniela the slightest bit of my worries, but I couldn't burden her. She had enough things on her mind, like searching for a new job ever since she quitted working at my father's place.

She reached out a hand and placed it on my leg. "Sweetie, what's been going on? You worry me," she said with a frown.

I licked my lips. "There has been so much going on. If I would tell you the whole story, we would be here a while."

"What about you start telling me where you feel comfortable with? Or at the start? You can stay as long as you like."

I smiled at her gratefully. She never failed to make me feel a part of her family. She was my family, the person who raised me and I was forever grateful for her.

So I started telling from the moment Royden told me about his real job to where we were now, where we had stranded in our relationship at the moment. Daniela never interrupted me. She let me speak my memories, about the events I had gone through. When I teared up, she sat closer to me and rubbed my back like a mother would have done. She held my hand when I told her about Royden being hospitalized and that terrible evening. A tear fell down her eye when I told the bookstore would be closed.

When I was done, she held me close to her. She hugged me tight, cried with me and made sure I knew it was going to be okay. She never once scolded me for not telling her sooner. She never once pressured me to tell her the reason why I didn't tell her sooner.

"I'm so sorry you felt like you couldn't tell me this," Daniela eventually said when she pulled away.

I shook my head while wiping my eyes. "No, don't feel bad. I didn't tell you, because it was our shit to deal with. Not yours and... I didn't think of sharing it," I explained to her.

She sighed a little and sat back against the couch. She stared ahead for a few moments. "That's a lot of shit to deal with. How do you even cope with it?"

"I'm not even sure." I let out a breathy laugh. "I mean, I do have trouble sleeping, waking up in the night, because I'm scared someone will break in. But Roy is always there and it is getting better."

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