World of Rayllum

Regrets

This was when they were in the forest heading towards Umber Tor.

Rayla's Pov🔪

I was in camp. Callum and Ezran are out looking for food. I offered to come with them but once again, He said no..

Which leaves Soren with me. I was sitting on the soft ground against a tree. Its leaves were covering me so it was pretty dim in my place.

Soren was sitting across from me in the same position. He was telling stories and talking about whatever.

I just kept throwing pebbles on the tree across. Though sometimes it hits him on the head. But I didnt really care.

I wasnt even listening to him. My mind is on something else. Callum.

Ever since he came back, I cant help but notice that he keeps trying to push me away.

Whenever I offer to help he dosent accept it. Whenever I try to talk to him, he leaves after 2 minutes.

I guess he's angry with me...

Who wouldnt be...

I left them for Viren...

I left the perfectly good life I had for him...

And for what?

He was dead..

I couldnt find him..

I couldnt even find his daughter..

I couldnt find any proof that he was still alive...

My desire for revenge got the better of me...

I spent the last two years of my life living in sadness and despair...

I spent it trying to find him even though I knew deep down that there was no point...

I guess I didnt want to come home with nothing..

I guess I tried to reject the fact that I've been wasting my time...

I tried to reject the fact that I left the great life I had for nothing...

All the time I spent in trying to find him was a waste...

It was all for nothing...

How foolish of you Rayla...

No one can survive a fall that high yet you think that he is still alive!

How foolish, really...

By now tears were streaming down my face.

I stayed still.

Not throwing anything..

It wasnt until Soren mentioned it that I noticed I was crying.

"Rayla, are you... ok?" He asked in a hesitating voice. Probably didnt want to do something worse.

"Huh?" I snapped from my thoughts. I sniffled and quickly wiped away the tears.

"What happened?" He asked and stood up. He walked towards me and sat beside me.

He put his hand on my shoulder and looked at me with worry.

Soren can be a pain but he is a great friend. He stays loyal.

These are the times I appreciate him.

"Im fine Soren. Just thinking about some things.." I tried to reassure him.

But he didnt seem convinced.

"Im going to bed." I told him and was about to stand but he took my arm and dragged me down.

"You should eat first. I have some leftover bread." He stood up and ran to his stuff.

He went back and gave me a quarter half baguette.

I thanked him and quickly ate.

"So are you feeling better?" He asked when I finished eating.

I nodded. "Im going to bed. Thanks Soren." I stood up and went to the mat placed on the ground.

I layed down there and fell asleep feeling better.

Callum's Pov🔮

It was already sundown by the time me and Ezran came back to camp. We had a basket full of food.

However when we came back it was only Soren there. He was putting some more wood into the fire.

I looked around and spotted a sleeping Rayla.

"We're back." I announced. He looked at us. "Oh hey guys!" He greeted.

"By the way, Rayla fell asleep like 2 hours ago." He told us.

"But she hasnt eaten yet!" Exclaimed Ezran.

"She ate my leftover bread." He shrugged.

"Why did she sleep so early though?" I asked. He didnt answer and it looked like he was thinking.

"She... had a long day!" That's odd. Was Soren... Lying?

I wanted to confront him but if he's lying then it must be something private she dosent want us to know.

So I didnt press any further.

It was about midnight. Soren and Ezran are already sleeping.

But I remained awake.

I kept thinking about how I treated Rayla when she came back.

I was angry but happy as well. Somehow my angry side took over and I kept trying to push her away.

My heart denies I treat her this way.

But my brain says otherwise.

I can see how hard she's trying to talk to me.

But being the stupid old me, I decide to stay away from her.

And I regret it.

It aches my heart to see her disappointed..

I want to forgive her.

I want to apologize.

I want to get back with her.

But I cant just forgive her so easily.

She made that mistake by following her desire to see him dead.

She cant just go back and expect everything to be the same.

She cant go back and expect that we're still together.

She cant go back and expect that I'll accept her without a sorry.

She needs to pay for her mistakes.

Which is why Im ignoring her.

That will make her realize.

Even though I feel bad, she deserves this.

No matter how much it aches my heart to see her sad...

I wont forgive her. Yet...

Even though it hurts...

🔪🔮🔪🔮🔪🔮🔪🔮🔪🔮