Benchtrio's Amazing Guide to City Living | Ft. The Hermits & SBI

'I'm the owner', the other responds

"Why is there a stranger in our living room?"

More specifically, why is there a man tied up, passed out and clearly kidnapped, in the Dream Team's living room? The central light is on, casting the room in an orange hue akin to that of an interrogation lamp in Pandora's Vault. Shadows disturb the features of the man in the chair, whose head is hanging limply, eyes closed and not stirring a bit even in the uncomfortable position he's been put in. Ropes hold him straight against the back of the chair, wrapping around his chest (uncomfortably, no doubt!) and arms, which have also been tied awkwardly behind the chair's back.

"And tied up?", George adds to Sapnap's statement, arms crossing nonchalantly under his chest. He gazes at XD with the most unassuming face he can muster. It's easy for him to keep a serious look, thankfully, but the god doesn't need to wilt under a heavy glare for him to pick apart.

XD does that to himself, enamored with George as he is. On the ground, the god looks nothing more than a small plush or an over-sized pawn that a toddler found and decided to take a permanent marker to it. Incredibly unthreatening, deceiving yet mischievous all the same. If George had to guess what XD represented, he'd pick trickery without a doubt.

Though, XD has denied that statement multiple times. He claims that there is another god who controls that domain, named Drista –though he says that he is way better than her. Because they have such a big chance of meeting another god before going to the afterlife and XD needs to be jealous! For better or worse, XD is never subtle with any jealousy outburst, loudly proclaiming that he needs attention lest he shoves all five glasses off of the counter like a bold, demanding cat whose dinner arrived at 17:01 and not at 17:00.

"That is because", XD starts but pauses for a second, bending towards the chair with confidence in his voice. "This is the Listener"

"That's literally the video club cashier", comes Dream's voice from the entrance to the room, having just woken up to the sound of conversation. Not the best way to wake up, especially if you're stupid and pull an all-nighter trying to look for a certain pawn-shaped escapee instead of waiting at home like Sapnap and George.

Y'know, wait the whole 48 hours to file a missing person's report or something. Probably a missing item report if anything. XD does look more like a keychain on steroids.

"No way is that guy The Listener, he doesn't even have the wings and ears", he continues, yawning mid-way through his sentence before walking to the kitchen to have breakfast.

Tussling his bedhead with his free hand, Dream almost bangs his head on the cabinet but makes up for it by accidentally banging his toe at the table leg. Silently and very, very slowly, he crouches, lacking the energy to shout curses this early in the day, so he cradles his foot and wishes the unfairly loud pain away. It doesn't work but when has toe pain gone away so simply?

"You good there, Dream?", Sapnap –the bastard– has the guts to laugh at his poor state. Dream, however, also has the guts to admit his weaknesses.

"No", and promptly, he makes a mental note to beat up Sapnap's ass even more during sparring today. If they make it to the tower with the human XD dragged –somehow– to their house. They're getting so sued after this ordeal.

Well, unless they keep the guy in the garage, then– No! Bad thoughts, Dream, bad thoughts! You're a hero, not a villain!

And yet, they are housing a villain. Actually, said 'villain' can't even be called that because XD lacks many, many morals and should be categorized as a five-year-old in the school system. Too bad they can't send him to Primary so they can have six hours of silence and peace minimum to work.