And I, you

CHAPTER 14: GRIEVING FOR THE LIVING

"What die didn't stay dead"

- Taylor Swift, 'Cowboy like me"

"He was calling up Ezra? Are you sure? Isn't he-?"

"Dead yeah, maybe he was calling death, you know?"

"No?"

"Yeah that makes sense," I say on the phone to Arthur, my only ally now it seems, which is unsettling.

"No, it does not. Do you not remember the very vivid accident on the street where both of you were present?"

"It's tough to forget,"

"Hmm, I bet with that memory of yours,"

Remember how I said unsettling?
This, right here.

I could really do without the snide comments but with Arthur, it's like asking the impossible. I'm really trying, but speaking to Arthur is making me miss Miles more and the pain is overwhelming, I can't bear it. Why is it always them? They've passed on but I'm still drowning in this grief. I'm bitter, resentful and now, always incomplete. 

"Arthur, did you find the body?"

"No"

"Any dental records?"

"No, but-"

"He's alive,"

"You're crazy, Ezra is dead," he says with a scoff. 

"Then explain this,"

"I'm trying to, okay? Let me call you back in an hour with some updates."

"Arthur!" I say into the speakerphone but he hangs up, he's such a snivelling little piece of shit, one of these days I might just end him. With a twisted turn of events, he isn't my biggest problem it seems, the mysterious phone call of Miles to Ezra is not only infuriating but also incredibly weird because why would Miles call Ezra in his last moments? Was Miles aware that these were going to be his final moments? Was he asking Ezra for help?

He's alive.

His body was never found. There were no dental records.

I pace around my room and then sit down at my desk. I can't figure it out, he was supposed to be dead and Miles was the one who confirmed this news. I feel a sense of betrayal creep its way in, if by some shot, Ezra is alive and Miles knew how big of a threat Ezra is to me, then why keep it a secret? 

And why do their deaths sound so superficial? I know Miles is dead, I saw his body with my own eyes but Ezra? Even Li? Everything is somehow taking me back to her case, why can't I let things just be buried? But something is off and the only way to know is to dig the grave deeper, and find if there were any skeletons to even begin with. 

I take out Miles' phone from the plastic bag and try calling Ezra but I know it's of no use, obviously, he wouldn't pick up. If he's alive, the last person he would want to be near is me. 

"Hello?" a deep gruff voice answers me.

"Ezra?" I ask in disbelief. I can't believe he picked up, surely he must know that Miles is dead? What kind of sick twisted games is this man playing?

"Luna? Jesus Christ, I thought it was Miles but not everyone can come back from the dead," he says with a chuckle.

This cannot be happening, there is absolutely no way he can be alive right now. He shouldn't be alive, this is not how it was supposed to be. I take deep breaths to try and calm down but it is so much harder than excepted, all the air is suffocating me. It could never end well, he was the reason they put me in the safe house, if he is alive then it's over for me. He already shot me once, whats to say he wouldn't do it again? Maybe he'll even finish the job this time, can't say it doesn't put me out of this misery. 

"So it is true, you are alive," I say and close the door of my room. No one should be listening to this conversation. 

"I am, you think I'm dumb enough to get myself killed in a shootout? I'm a trained assassin woman," he says with a scoff. 

"Miles knew?"

"He was the one who covered up my death," 

"Then why hide it from me? Why send me to fucking Florida?" I almost scream into the phone. 

"I thought you'd like a change of scenery,"

"Are you fucking kidding me? You know I can't even see,"

"I know bad joke, but onto more serious things now. I am not the reason you were in that safe house okay? My death was a ruse for a reason, you need to be acutely aware of your surroundings at all costs," he says and I sense a bit of hesitation in his tone. He's not even revealing any explicit information, what is he so reluctant about?

"Who is it then?"

"I can't tell you, it's not that easy."

"I am done with being kept in the dark, after everything, the least you can do is goddamn tell me," I say with teeth. I cannot play mind games with these boys anymore, I need answers and after his death, the least he can do is tell me the fucking truth, he owes me that much. 

"It's really not that simple love, it's better if you don't know,"

"I can decide that for myself, just fucking tell me,"

"When the time comes, I will tell you. The less you know, the better,"

"But-"

"Luna, miles knew. Miles knew and look where it got him, I told him to stop putting his nose where it doesn't belong,"

"But he died in an avalanche Ezra, how could that possibly be staged,"

"Grow up will you? He was murdered and if you don't stop with the nagging, so will you be," he says and cuts the call.