The Butterfly and The Moth

26

Though a part of me wanted to run away from Sterling and Daisy and all of the other characters from my new and messed up world —I couldn't.

I felt like I had the morning that Erik came into the pool house. Like the oxygen had been removed from the room. My lungs were desperately aching for more oxygen, but I simply couldn't pull any into my body. Momentarily, there was no oxygen. So. , momentarily, I was frozen.

I blinked as I looked down at my phone and the text message that Sterling had sent. I knew he knew. There was no other explanation. He had figured it out. He had solved the riddle and he hadn't believe my lies. Or, Erik's for that matter.

I wasn't sure I intended to, or wanted to for that fact, but my head snapped up from my phone. My eyes immediately went to Sterling, of course they did.

And he was still looking back at me, the way I already knew he would be.

But what surprised me was the look on Sterling's face as he watched me read his text message over and over again. I expected him to be looking at me triumphantly. After all, he had been smart enough to figure it out, with only minimal clues and such a short amount of time passed.

And I expected him to look at me with distrust. I had betrayed my sister, so I deserved that. Daisy was his best friend. I've never had a best friend so I didn't have first hand experience, but from what I know, to betray one is to betray both.

Mostly I was waiting for his look of disgust. I was disgusting. What I did was disgusting. I knew that. I knew that. But for some reason, I didn't want Sterling to know the same thing.

But, Sterling wasn't looking at me with disgust. He wasn't looking at me with distrust or triumph.

Sterling, with his grey eyes that I used to hate so much, was looking at me like he was still searching for something more.

But didn't he realize? I had no more. This was enough.

"What's going on?" I heard Daisy's voice ring out, quickly and suddenly snapping me from the false reality that I had created with Sterling.

The reality in which he and I had been the only two in the room. The one where we were reading each other. Or perhaps, I was just trying to read him, because he had already read me in my entirety.

"What?" I slurred out quickly, barely hearing her words and instead rushing out my own word to deflect any more questioning.

I knew Daisy would find out soon, now that Sterling knew. It was only a matter of time. I could picture it now, the way his eyes would light up when he confirmed his suspicions. He never liked me, and now he had the opportunity to say the words we all love to say. I told you so.

"You and sterling are just staring at each other," Daisy continued, not picking up on my slightly panicked tone. "And not in the I want to rip your clothes off kind of way. What's going on? Did you guys have a fight?"

"No," I said, glancing down at my phone again, my heart still pumping loudly in my chest.

"You can tell me if you did," Daisy said quickly, "I know he's my best friend, but you don't have to worry about that. I'll always take your side. Sisters before misters."

I looked back to Daisy, her words driving a steel pole through my heart, and my stomach too. She looked so sure of those words. Her eyes were so light. They were so light. She had no idea.

"Dahlia?" Daisy's smile finally faltered, turning into soft straight line instead. "What's wrong?"

"No," I repeated my word, shaking my head so that I could break eye contact with my sister. "No, nothing. I'm fine, I just feel... sick."