20 ~ Always In My Heart

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Asalamualaikum!

Quick update; thoda quick! :) :*

So yea, had some comfusion while writing the previous chapter so had to rearrange a few things and clear it out. And by the time I came to this chapter, I realized im already half way done... So yea! Here it is! :)

Have fun reading! <3

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One month later...

*Shehry's perspective*

I sat next to Hussian who I knew was internally dying with hatred for himself; regret that ate him second by second

Itna sab kuch ho gaya tumhare saath Anber jis mein tumhari ghalti thi hi nahi, aur aaj bhi tum apne aapko kusoorvaar thehra rahi thi.

One month ago, after Hussain got discharged from the hospital, that night Hussain told me the whole truth and that diary left me speechless

I knew Anber still felt embarrassed and ashamed of me being sent to jail for helping her but not knowing the whole truth made me feel more bad. If I knew the truth, I would have never let them break apart from each other. I would have atleast tried something and knowing I didn't do anything, a seed of guilt planted itself in me which was growing inside of me everytime I see Hussain

Silence! Silence was the only thing floating in the air right now, engulfing Hussain and I.

I glance over at Hussain who was staring out at the wall ahead of him with an expressionless face while he sat with his hands wrapped around his legs that were brought close to his chest

His red, puffed eyes; his pale face; not too dark lines that trailed down from his eyes to his neck indicating trails of his tears; his messy hair; his over grown beard; dark circles under his eyes... the state he had put himself in was like a knife that was stabbing my heart whenever I saw him, it was like a new bubble of guilt revealing itself in me, which made me hate myself.

Ek mahine se zyada ho gaya lekin iske aansu rukne ka naam nahi lete hai. Bas apne aapko isi gham mein duba kar rakhta hai

Somewhere inside I knew I was also responsible for everything that was taking place in the present

I wipe my tears away and let out a deep breath. I place a hand on Hussain's shoulder. "Hussain?"

He sat motionless as if he didn't hear me

"Hussain?" I call again and shake him a little to grab his attention

"Hmm?" He breaks out of his obliviousness and looks at me. His eyes meet mine and those eyes that were filled with nothing but hatred, pain, and regret did not allow a single word to escape my lips

I wanted to hug him, take all his pain away and bring my old Hussain back...but I was helpless

"Hu..hussain, kab tak aise rahoge? Ek aadha mahina ho gaya hai?" I can't see you like this Hussain." I pull myself together and manage to utter a few words in the form of sentences. I felt my voice crack a little but I contained myself

"Jab tak mera Allah par diya hua bharosa sach na ho jaae, jab tak wo mere is bharose ko qubool na karlein, aur jab tak wo meri Anber mujhe wapas na laut aae." He whispers with a voice that held no feelings, no emotions, just simply a sentence that was enough to break my heart once again

Despite my effort, tears make their way down my eyes.

I grab Hussain's shoulders and pull himself in me for a hug.

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