The Perfect Trap // jeon twins

10. jungwon

The best way to spend the night before however long Jungwon would have to be with Jungkook was to stay with Myeongsoon. Jungwon was trying to spend as much time with her as possible, anyways. If he were to inherit the crown soon, he wanted their life to be the norm they knew for as long as possible.

It was still unsure what was going to happen with them. With his whole life. Taking over Silvia was always an obvious part of his life, but Jungwon never paid much attention to the in-between transition part. When he'd no longer have his old life, and wouldn't yet have his new life. The time of letting go of what he knew and adjusting to the new.

Jungwon wasn't in the mood to accept he'd have to let go of this. Of slow nights with Myeongsoon, when he wasn't an athlete and she wasn't a scientist, and they could just be – in silence, in the present moment. Of every other moment with Myeongsoon he knew and would only get to know. Somehow, all this time, he thought inheriting the crown and growing up with her were parallels.

Jungwon wasn't in the mood, but the cruel time was running out, and Myeongsoon wasn't willing to put it off anymore.

"How long will you be gone?" she asked.

"I don't know anything," he said. "Kwan said he will send it somewhere and we have to find it. Knowing him, it can be everywhere."

"So you're not coming to the graduation."

"I doubt it."

She sighed. "I don't like this."

Jungwon rubbed his thumb along the skin of her hand, pulling her back against his chest. "I'll come back as fast as I can."

"And then you'll be gone again soon. In Silvia. When you're done with the competition."

His heart ached. For the first time in years. Jungwon never knew the ache of a heartbreak, but this felt awfully familiar.

"Let's not talk about it," he said. Please, he wanted to add. To beg.

"About you marrying someone born there to be able to rule the land?"

He couldn't imagine it, think about it. Every thought made him less and less certain about everything.

"Moon, please."

"No." She sounded as pained as he felt. "I've let go so many times, because you didn't want to talk about it. But I want to talk about it. We need to talk about it. The dumbest person would understand it means we're breaking up and I hate that."

"We don't have to," he said. "It will only be a marriage on paper. I told you."

She pushed him back, blasting out of bed. "Do you hear yourself, Jungwon? Marriage on paper? With another woman? Creature? Something? Why can't you take me there and marry me instead?"

"You don't wanna get married and you were not born there."

Myeongsoon wasn't trying to have this conversation with him anymore. She was having it, and she wasn't going to quit until everything was crystal clear.

"What is even wrong with you? How can you keep saying you love me and you want me, when you don't fucking want me? You want to inherit the land. You want to rule it. You want your parents to think of you as the perfect kid. And there is no place for me in this scenario."

Jungwon felt nauseous, rolling out of bed.

"I don't want to be the perfect kid," he said. "I'm doing this for Jungkook."

He hated saying this. He'd repeated this phrase enough times for his family to get a hang of it. He was inheriting the land, because that's what the perfect brother blueprint suggested. Jungkook wanted to be a model, so Jungwon – when they were still young – agreed to inherit the land. For his twin brother. So that his brother could follow his dreams.