Home is where the heart is - A Bucky x Reader Story

Chapter 15: Christmas Blues, Part 1

[Author's note: This is going to be quite a long chapter compared to the previous ones. My way of saying sorry for the long wait you occasionally have to endure with me 😂 Enjoy! :) ]

-Y/n's POV-

I was sitting on a bench right next to a window and looked outside, watching the snow flakes make their way to the ground. Every single one of them reminding me that I wasn't home, that I wasn't with my family and friends and that it was indeed Christmas. Well, Christmas Eve, but still.

„Doll, what's wrong? You look...upset." Bucky asked and sat down next to me. „Don't you like snow?" I sighed. Was there in point in lying? No. Did I try anyway? Yes.

„Everything is fine."

„With all due respect, that's bullshit. We've been here for a week and you haven't looked this sad since the day we got here. So what's wrong? You know you can tell me." He said and put a hand on my knee, that I had pulled close to my body. I turned away and looked back out the window, watching the snow again.

„Look at the snow, Bucky." I whispered. „I am, it's beautiful." he responded and squeezed my knee. „Do you know what day it is today?" I asked, not taking my gaze off the window. Christmas means a great deal to me, always has and always will. But I don't think Bucky knows that.

„It's... Friday?" he said, though it sounded more like a question. „It's Christmas Eve." I whispered. It's Christmas and we were here.

„Oh, that. I know. But Christmas is just a day like every other, is it not?" Bucky asked and I felt his gaze on me. I loved Christmas, always have. Every year, for as long as I can remember, we had celebrated Christmas together at the Tower and I had loved everything about it. All the traditions, the snow, the music, the lights, the cookies, the decorations, the presents and most of all to be with my family. With dad and the avengers.

„I suppose..." I whispered and blew a strand of hair out of my face. I had talked to dad two days ago and he apologized for everything, and even though I was still disappointed and upset about everything, I missed him. Especially today, and tomorrow it would probably be even worse.

„When Steve and I were still kids, we used to go out and play in the snow all the time. We built snowmen, even an igloo once! But we never had snowball fights. Not after I almost killed the boy...you know, he was tiny, right? And I accidentally hit him so hard with a snowball that he just fell over. I was super worried that I hurt him, but he was just layin there in the snow laughing. My parents weren't exactly... the best, but Steve brought fun into my life. But that's also part of the reason I said to you that I didn't want to talk to you about my past. It just... out of the things I do remember, most of them hurt..." Bucky told me. I raised my head and turned towards him to find him smile at me weakly. „Thank you for telling me about that, I really appreciate it. I'm sorry if I made you feel uncomfortable by asking about your past last week." I apologize. „Don't be. You have every right to ask, especially when I know so much about you.... Oh and I still remember everything by the way!" he said and winked, apparently trying to save the mood.

„Oh is that so, Mister Barnes?" I said and grinned at him, playing along with him.

„Most definitely, my lady!" he said and I briefly snorted with laughter.

„Alright, then. What's my favorite color?"

„[Your favorite color]"

„Hmm... correct. Name of my first dog?"

„Trick question! You never had a dog because Tony doesn't like them. I always knew there's something wrong with him. But your first cat's name was Eduardo!"