I'm Not Like Them (A Nirvana Fan Fic - Kurt Cobain! X OFC)

Let's Talk About Someone Else

I wake up the next morning in Sally and Jeff's spare bedroom, feeling lost and not wanting to emerge from the mattress.

Is this depression? Is this how Kurt felt most days? If so, I can't describe the pain and how hopeless I feel. How are tears still falling from my eyes? This fucking sucks.

I hear a knock at the door and manage to sit up with my back against the headboard.

"Come in." I say with a groggy voice.

I see the door peek open and in walks Jeff with a tray. 

"Morning sunshine." He smiles.

"Hey, um...everything okay?" I ask, a little baffled as to why he's here.

"Yeah, I made you breakfast...toast, some fruit and a coffee. There wasn't much in the pantry, but I hope it's okay." He replies before walking over and placing the tray on my lap.

I smile, genuinely amazed that someone would do this for me. He's trying to make me feel better and I wholeheartedly appreciate it.

"Aww Jeff, that's so sweet of you. You didn't have to." I say politely.

"I wanted to. I know what it's like to walk in on the person you thought would go the mile with you, fucking someone else. It's a punch to the stomach, but you feel it in your heart." Jeff reveals.

He sits on the end of the bed as I take a sip of the coffee he made me. Which tastes so fucking good.

"I feel broken Jeff. My entire being....everything I did had Kurt in the picture, or in the plan. I can't believe he would do that to me. Maybe it's me. Maybe I'm the problem." I say looking away, tearful once more.

"Hey" Jeff says, bringing me back to reality. "This isn't you. This is his problem. He lost the best person he will ever have in his life. He's a fucking fool."

"I was gone too long. I tried to call him but after the first month he just stopped picking up." I say.

"Your Mom died....you took as much time as you needed and I'm pretty fucking sure the pain of losing her is still fresh as hell. He can't get that? His problem, not yours." Jeff assures me.

I quickly try to change the subject before I start ugly crying.

"Where's Sal?" 

"Oh she's got an interview at some clothing store downtown. I know she'll get it, they'd be crazy not to hire her and she's wanted to work there for months." Jeff says, smiling as we talk about Sally.

"You really love her don't you?" I ask.

"Bass player to Bass player? Yeah....she's amazing. I'm gonna ask her to marry me." Jeff smiles. "Think she'll say yes?"

I smile feeling happy for both of them. I'm also reminded that Kurt asked me to marry him yesterday in a last ditch effort to try and get me to stay with him. However, I stay focused on Jeff's words.

"I've never seen Sal this happy. Of course she will! She loves you too." I reply. " So how are you planning the proposal?" 

"I'm gonna do it on stage at a show. Just a local one here in Seattle at the Paramount...I think she'd dig that....you think?" He tells me, looking super excited about his plan.

"She will fucking love it." I say.

We hear the baby start to cry and instantly, Jeff's paternal instincts kick in.

"I better get that." Jeff says, as he gets up. "Enjoy your breakfast!" 

He walks towards the door and opens it.