Just A Thought

13

I stand there in shock. My mind is frozen in place.

He was in my room. Both of them were.

And they took the clothes I was wearing. This couldn't be happening. I have been gone for only around fifteen minutes.

As soon as I feel panic rising inside of me I run to the door and lock it. I take the pills from the drawer and lie down in the middle of the room.

They were in here.

I stare at the ceiling and when everything becomes too much I swallow some pills. I have no idea how much I take but they seem to help me. I calm down after a few minutes and just sob.

Why me? Why always me?

Loud sobs leave my mouth as I try to cover it with my hand. Tears are running down my cheeks not seeming to stop.

I feel alone. I feel so alone. I have to tell someone. I know I should but maybe if I keep it to myself I can forget it and act like it never happened.

They raped me.

The thought is stabbing my chest. My heart. My soul.

They raped me. They got what they wanted but they're still here. Right now they're in the same building as me. They can walk through my bedroom door anytime and I know I won't be able to stop them.

What if they come back?

What am I supposed to do?

I look at the pills. If I take too much maybe...

But I'm not going to do it.

It's just a thought.

ZACHARY

I know something is wrong. With Valeri. Something has happened. She has looked full of joy and happiness for a week and then just switched.

I lie in my bed for some time. I want to ask her if something has happened. Maybe I'm overreacting. Maybe it's just one of her depressive episode. She used to get them often and I always helped when she had one. I helped her showering. I made her food and I held her when she had nightmares or panic attacks.

I think Valeri needs my help.

Fuck I'm probably overreacting but I really need to make sure she's okay. My intuition is telling me that something is seriously wrong.

She flinched when I tried to touch her face. Did she think I was going to hit her?

That thought cuts right through my chest.

Alright I just need to see if she's okay.

I get off the bed and open my bedroom door. The hallway is dark but I can see a light coming from Valeri's room next to mine. It looks like she's still awake.

I come closer and listen. I don't want to wake her up if she's sleeping.

I hear something. Crying.

Wait is Valeri crying?

Shit.

I softly knock on her door and the noise immediately stops. But she doesn't open the door.