"I-I... my... my dad... he..." I stutter, trying to get the words out, but failing. My face got red and heated, and my eyes brim with water. I know I have to say it, but I just can't the words out of my mouth. "He hurts me!" I blurt out, unable to say it any other way.
"Your dad abuses you?!" he asks, trying to keep the anger out of his voice, but only partly succeeding.
"Yes" I sob. He pulls me into a hug, gentle, considering how mad he seemed.
"Emily, people care about you. You may not know it, but you have friends," he reassured me, "and I know I tell you this a lot, but you don't seem to understand what I'm saying. You have a reason to live, okay? Don't listen to your father or anyone else who is rude to you." All I could do was cry into his shoulder, until I started shivering. I had forgotten I was still soaking wet.
"One sec," Justin said to me, leaving the room, only to come back with a blanket. He wrapped it around my shoulders, which actually warmed me up - at least enough so I wasn't shivering anymore. It also covered me which made me feel a little better about what I looked like. At least he couldn't desert me anymore. He sat down next to me and lay his arm over my shoulder, squeezing gently, so he wouldn't hurt my many sore spots.
"Okay, you're doing a better job at warming me up than this blanket is," I said, quietly laughing through my tears. He wrapped his strong, warm arms around me and rubs my back slowly.
"Do you want to stay here tonight, or go back?" he asks, probably worried about my father.
"I'll just go home. I don't want to cause any trouble, or get you involved with my dad."
"Hey, you got me involved when you told me about it!" he says, half joking.
"You practically forced me to tell you!" I shot back.
"Okay, but, be careful. I don't want you getting any more hurt than you already are," he said, lowering his voice so his mom and siblings wouldn't hear.
"I will" I promised him, knowing I was being honest about being careful, but that didn't mean I wouldn't get hurt. When I take the blanket off, I hand it to him, and put my sweatshirt on. I walked out the door, and down the stairs, to face him.
I opened the door to go in my house, but it was almost immediately slammed shut behind me. My dad turned around seething with anger.
"Where have you been? You know that if you tell anyone, I won't hesitate to-"
"I, umm, I was at the library. I had a lot of homework. I'm sorry. I won't do it again," I told him, practically pleading him not to hurt me.
"You're damn right you won't," he said, punching me in the face. I knew there was going to be a mark tomorrow, and judging by his mood, several more, as well. "And don't cut me off!" He says, hitting the side of my head with the palm of his hand.
"You-"
Slap.
"Little-"
Punch.
"Selfish-"
Shove.
"Unwanted, little brat!" he yelled pushing me backwards farther and farther every word until I hit the wall.
"I'm sorry, dad. I really am. Just please, please don't-" I was cut off by him punching me in the nose, leaving it bloody, and surely, tomorrow, bruised and swollen. I closed my eyes to stop the tears from coming.
You've had worse than this, Emily. This isn't that bad.
He slapped me across the face, telling me how worthless and useless I am. "You are a pathetic excuse for a daughter, you know that? There isn't one good thing about you. You are stupid and helpless, and nobody will ever want you!" he yelled, punching my stomach and making me drop to the ground in pain. He stomped his foot on my back so I heard it crack. Ow, shit, that hurts. It's not broken, I know that but I sure am in pain.
"Are you crying?" He laughs, "only little babies cry. You should be able to put up with this. Since you clearly can't, though, I'm going to show you just how much I make you act like a little tiny girl." He steps on my stomach to walk over me, lingering there with one foot in the air, so all his 200 pounds (I don't really know how much he weighs, but he looked about that much) are on me.
"Get up you incapable, pointless excuse of a girl," he threatened, "or I will make it much worse than it already will be for you coming home late."
I stumbled to my feet, trying not to show him how much pain I was in, but to no avail.
He held me against the door, and punched me in the face, chest, stomach, arm, "I know you are faking being badly hurt, so I'll stop, but guess what. I can see right through you. You act like you're some poor little girl, who has the worst life ever. Well, guess what? I'm doing this for you. You'll thank me later in life. Trust me," he slurred. Wow, how drunk is he? I mean, I know I will never thank him for this. Ever.
He kicks my shins one after another, and punches my eye, shoving my head against the wall, leaving it throbbing in agony.
Next he grabs my ear and pulls me to the small, dingy kitchen we have.
Pulling out a knife, he hovers it against my chest, making swirling notions around it, and getting closer with every movement he makes. Finally he's drawing in my chest with the knife, cutting deeper and deeper into my skin. Then, all at once, he stops.
"Now we can't have you dying, can we. That would be no fun for me," he say sickly, "Go to you're room and get some sleep. You are going to school tomorrow whether you like it or not."
I slinked up to my room, as fast as I could, considering my suffering. The door was standing open already, and I slumped into my room.
I take out the food, and eat a horribly small proportion, savoring every tiny bite.
I go to the bathroom as quietly as possible, and wash off all the fresh blood on my body. I get my razor again, and cut myself.
One for telling Justin
Two for letting him hurt me
Three for not dying
Four for letting people bully me
Five for letting dad take it so far
And six for trying to make good memories out of such a horrible world
I look at my arm and see all the scars. I don't know how long I've been doing this, but I have cut a lot. I take a quick shower and dry myself off, then get in my pajamas.
When I was done I fell onto my bed, sleeping almost immediately, thanks to the excruciatingly long day I had had.
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A/N
Hey sorry for the shorter update again😁 I am trying to update more often but I'm really busy. Anyway, I hope you liked it. Comment and vote if you want me to update!
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Forever
FanfictionEmily grew up with an abusive father, who had tortured her and her mother since finding out that Emily's mother was pregnant. 14 years into Emily's traumatic life, her mother was killed by her father, leaving her under his care, as no one knew the c...
