Rafe x y/n - I am at home

the final

i woke up at the chateau, feeling the world has just turned upside down. it felt different. everything felt different. it's been a week ever since everything that happened. til this day, it feels like it happened yesterday.

i got out of bed and went outside to see jj who was rolling a blunt. i sat down next to him on the couch in silence. we both didn't say anything. we both didn't know what to say or do anymore

"hell of a summer" jj said

"hell of a summer"

the question is what now? what else is there to do? where else is there for me to go?

"let's go meet up with the others" jj said. we both got up and hopped on jj's motorcycle.

this feeling reminds me of when i would go on rafes bike. why am i still thinking about him. he did this to me. he broke me into a million pieces.

as jj and i walked in the wreck, everyone starred at us. whispering and starring, i was getting anxiety.

at this moment, jj grabbed my hand and gave me a look. i gave him a weak smile and nodded. he pulled me through the whole restaurant to get to the back where everyone was.

rafe. topper. kelce.

passing by the crowd, i saw him. there he was. we held eye contact and didn't let go until i couldn't see him anymore.

"rafe" i whispered under my breath. how does he have such a soft spot in my heart. i don't know if i like that or not.

jj and i made it over to kie and pope who were eating some good looking sandwiches.

"hi" i said softly to kie and hugged her.

"kie is there food" jj said. she giggled and put down her sandwich.

"let me go check, come with me y/n" she asked.

"sure"

we both got up and walked in the restaurant. this time i looked down so i didn't have to look at rafe again. i waited for kie at the bar as she went in the back to get food.

"y/n?"

i looked over and it was topper.

"hi topper"

i actually don't know how i feel about topper. he has a grudge for my friends, my friends has a grudge on him. personally i don't but since all my friend does then i do too.

it's hard to hate someone when you've seen the good to them. you grew up with them so you know how they think and act.

"how are you"

"i've been better, thanks for asking"

"look, i don't mean to get in the way of anything"

"rafe wanted me to tell you he's going to be down at your guys spot? he wants to talk to you but you don't have too if you're not ready obviously" he added.

i looked down and away from topper.

"bye y/n"

"bye top" i whispered

"what was that about?" kie asked as she brought some food.

"nothing"

-

i've been sitting at the table with my friends eating and talking but all i can think about is if i should go to rafe or not.

"i'll be right back"

"where are you going" jj asked me standing in front of me

"i need to buy something"

i walked down to the beach to our spot which was where rafe and i sat the first night i was back. there was a kegger, rafe punched aaron for me.

i see rafe. sitting down, knees to his chest, looking out at the ocean.

i took a big breath and proceeded to walk over.

i sat down, a few inches away from him. i brought my knees to my chest and sat in silence, waiting for him to talk to me.

"i'm sorry"

i didn't say anything

"i'm sorry for everything" i felt him looking at me at this moment

"you deserve someone better then me, someone like maybank"

"i thought nothing could get in the way of my feelings for you. nothing. but what i forgot was the family i'm apart of. i'm not proud to be a cameron nor am i proud of what i've done to you"

"i'm not asking for forgiveness right now but i hope one day you can forgive me" he said and got up.

me on the other hand, im holding my tears back. tears were coming out because i can still feel it in my heart that i love rafe. this is our official breakup, i can feel it.

"by the way, i'm trying to be sober y/n. i know it's only been a week but it's still something. i love you" he said and then walked away.

tears are just coming out. so much tears.

"what the fuck" i whispered

this is the most heartbroken break up i have ever been through.

i've always seen the good in rafe, even right now. after what he put me through, i cannot stop thinking about him.

i was right this morning, the world did turn upside down. my home is gone. home is rafe. rafe was my home. my comfort.

"i love you too rafe cameron"

the end

stay tune for part two..coming out soon