poetry

catch up

I feel dead and alive at the same time
tired of live; but still scared to die.
Filled with thoughts
and so empty at the same time.
at this point, nothing brings joy 
feels like getting constantly destroyed

I mean whats the point of even trying?
Why should I chase something I know I could never catch up?
Chase some useless degree
to make everyone happy but me.
Chase a live everyone wants to achieve
But no one cares about my dreams.
Chase a personality I know I could never be
Because Im to much like me
-too weird, unfitting and feared.