wenclair one shots

enid this is weird

a/n: OKAY IK THIS ONE'S A LITTLE WEIRD BUT IT HAS LORE TO IT THAT WILL BE EXPLAINED AT THE END SO JUST BARE W ME PLS🙏

blonde bimbo:
yoko help

divina's slut:
yeees?

blonde bimbo:
i do not understand literally anything we're going over in health help

divinia's slut:
r u asking me to teach u sex ed rn

blonde bimbo:
yes.

divina's slut:
aren't lesbians supposed to be good at this stuff?

blonde bimbo:
have u met my gf

divina's slut:
alr fair point i gotchu come to my dorm

blonde bimbo:
QUEEN ILY OMW

  not even 5 minutes later yoko opens the door for enid, the girl walks inside and takes a seat on the cushions on the floor that yoko has in front of her bed.

  "okay so what exactly do you need help with?" yoko questions.

  "uhh y'know just like how it works, he assigned this stupid project and i wanna make sure i actually know what i'm talking about in it, academic validation is literally the only thing getting me through school right now so i'd like die if i did bad on it."

  "so what exactly do you expect me to do? finger you?? like if that's what you want i guess i can talk to divina about it..." yoko jokes, smirking at the disgusted look on the sinclair girl's face.

  "ew yoko!! i just, i don't know, clarify that what i think is right is well, actually right. do you have like.." enid explains, scanning around the room for an object she could use. "oh!" enid grabs an empty glass soda bottle by her bedside and positions it underneath her armpit.

  "okay so, say this," she gestures towards the opening of the bottle, "is the hole or whatever the fuck it's called, and my fingers are the lips. ew this is so fucking weird what the hell."

  yoko looks at her funnily, "um.."

  "just go with it!!" enid whines, "i don't know how else to do this. anyways does it work like this like do you just spread the.. lips," she says uncomfortably, laughing slightly. "and then just like that?" she questions, looking up at the vampire as she pokes her finger in the bottle.

  "enid this is weird."

  "you don't think i realized that?!" the blonde groans.

  "okay fine, yes i suppose that's right, or," she clears her throat slightly, "you can spread the legs, whatever works."

  "sex is weird." enid declares, earning an eyeroll from yoko.

  the lycan makes a move to remove her finger from the bottle, confident in her knowledge now thanks to yoko's clarification, only to be met with resistance. "oh shit."

  "hm?"

  the blonde twists her finger around, trying to get it unstuck from the bottle, ultimately failing. "well fuck. MY FINGERS STUCK YOKO."

  "SHUT UP!!" the brunette cackles, slapping her hand over her mouth as she laughs at the girls failed attempts at removing the bottle from her finger once more.

  "HELP???"

  "MY BAD C'MERE," yoko rushes over and grips onto the end of the bottle, tugging on it trying to help enid. "bro it's like stuck stuck."

  "shit, really? didn't notice it's not like my finger is stuck in a bottle as we speak or anything." enid replies sarcastically.

  "don't know if i can get this off, you might have to get wednesday's help."

  "fuck me, what the hell do i tell her when she asks why my fingers stuck in a bottle??"

  "just say you were being stupid or something, it's believable because its you. now, go go go, shoo, go get ur finger fixed." she ushers enid out of the room.

  the blonde sighs as she hears the door close behind her and decides to make her way to her and wednesday's room, trying to hide the bottle as she passes by people in the halls.

  "wednesday? you here? i'm in need of assistance." she calls out when she enters.

  wednesday emerges from her closet just then, "give me a name i'll sort it out."

  "what? no, that isn't the type of help that i need."

  "that's disappointing." wednesday replies solemly.

  enid puts her hand out for wednesday to see, trying to avoid the stares she recieved from the ravenette. "it's stuck."

  "how'd this ensue?"

  "you don't wanna know, trust me. just help, please."

  wednesday nods in response and grips onto the bottle, "this may hurt." she then pulls on it full force until it eventually pops off enid's finger.

  "that was humiliating." enid whines, dropping herself on her bed as she pretends to sob.

  "is your finger alright?" wednesday questions.

  enid evalutes the damage, "yeah, think so. thanks wedns."

  the girl nods in response as she takes a seat next to the girl, earning a small grin from the blonde. it is then that enid's phone goes off with a ping, and she sees that yoko sent her a video of her panicking while the bottle was stuck.

  "YOKO I SWEAR TO FUCKING GOD I WILL KILL YOU-" enid yells, earning a confused stare from wednesday as she runs out the door, quickly followed by thing intent on learning the gossip.

a/n: OKAY IK THIS ISNT V WENCLAIR BUT IT'S A FUNNY SITUATION SO I WANTED TO WRITE IT ANYWAYS

okay lore time so basically me and riley (hopeistheloml) were on ft right, and this mf just gets their finger stuck in a bottle (i have it on sr and its magnificent) they then had to go to their dad to get it off their finger and as they're walking up the stairs to him they hear "kids are stupid." and then they walk in with a bottle stuck on their finger, then their dad said "SEE HERE'S A PERFECT EXAMPLE WE HAVE A (insert age) YEAR OLD WITH THEIR FINGER STUCK IN A BOTTLE" and it was the funniest fucking shit ever anyways he had to get the bottle off their finger and then their mom looked at them and was like "riley... what were you doing" and i was just sitting there loosing my shit of ft

cut to like a week later we were talking abt the whole situation and laughing abt it so they decided to have a photoshoot w said bottle, and they jokingly stuck their finger in it again for a picture but bro got it stuck in the bottle again 💀 then like 3 days after that whole debacle, they got a new bottle (a bigger one so they didnt think they could get their finger stuck) and they were messing around with it and showing me how their fingers couldnt get stuck and them bam, it got stuck once more. and finally our last little instance was probably a week after that and they were messing around with the first bottle again i dont rememeber why tho but the mf got their finger stuck A FUCKING GAIN FOR LIKE THE 4TH TIME?? so bam backstory complete anyways sorry for subjecting u to this 😭😭

drink water and eat, i'm so proud of u :)