Judgment Day

Chapter 13 - Recovery

Ahsoka and Rex are the ones who drag him away from Obi-Wan's bedside. He didn't want to go, but they gave him no choice. He can't be there while the medics do whatever they need to, but Obi-Wan is not in very good shape. Ahsoka's hands are on his shoulders, and she's talking, though Anakin hardly hears her through the panic clouding his mind. "He'll be okay, I promise," she tells him again.

Anakin nods wordlessly, scrambling for some semblance of calm. A Jedi is calm, he reminds himself, but he can't find any of it. Is he capable of being one anymore? He nearly Fell. He was about to embrace the Dark Side, and he would have if not for Luke doing it instead. He can't believe he walked himself and his family into this corner. Of all the things he could have done, that was not one he thought himself capable of.

Ahsoka pulls him a distance away before they collapse to the floor from sheer exhaustion. "It will be alright," she promises, but Anakin knows better. He can feel it – nothing will ever be the same again. He's fighting for some semblance of calm, but his fear is tearing him apart. It feels like he can't breathe.

He tilts his head back against the wall, trying to breathe deeply, in and out. He remembers this. Obi-Wan's told him a thousand times – Obi-Wan, who could already be dead. He could be gone. They could lose him forever.

"The boys will take care of him. I'm sure there's something they can do. He'll be okay."

He opens his eyes, finally seeing Ahsoka sitting next to him for the first time. She looks so different yet so familiar, but the fear in her bright blue eyes makes her look like she's a young child again, instead of the late teen she is. "They'll try," he replies. They need to look at the bright side – he can only trust the Force that Obi-Wan will live. He doesn't know if he can do that anymore though. He wants to, but... he can't understand how it's possible that this needed to happen. There is so much that he's incapable of understanding, Anakin knows, but he still doesn't know. It had hurt so much when Ahsoka left, but he understood it because he loved her, but this is different. It's a matter of his master's life.

Ahsoka looks like she's on the verge of tears, but she doesn't cry. Some things hurt too deeply, Anakin thinks.

Master Yoda is gone with the Jedi. He didn't think it was possible, but it happened.

"We'll find some way to work this out," Anakin assures her. With a start, he remembers the legends about Plagueis. If he has to do that, he is willing. It scares him, but he'd do it if he had to. He promised Padme after his mother died that he would find a way to stop people from dying, and... he knows how to find that now. He won't tell Ahsoka or anyone about it. Padme would no doubt be upset – though how long will that matter? – and Ahsoka would be furious at the thought of him dabbling with the Dark Side no matter what the reason. Obi-Wan would be beyond disappointed, but Anakin would much rather see that than nothing. It doesn't matter as long as they're all alright.

"I don't understand how this could have happened," Ahsoka continues, biting her lip. "I came back, and I thought everything would be fine. Then Maul told me about Sidious and that he was – that he was grooming you, and none of us had any idea. We were willfully blind while he – I don't know how we missed that. And now the Jedi are gone, and so is Master Yoda, and Master Plo's probably gone, too, and then Luke Fell, and I don't know how that happened! If we knew he'd be there, we could have planned for him! But he was just there, and Sidious overwhelmed us and –"

It hurts to hear, but Anakin knows it's the simple truth. If he had told the others the truth about what happened to Luke, they could have waited. It would have been better, anyway – gather more Jedi and come in at Sidious at once after Luke is elsewhere. It would have worked, but he was too selfish to tell them, and this happened.