RoseBlood

Soliloquy

It's deathly silent and cool in the basement, only the sounds of our breathing slicing through the dangerous stillness of the room under the house. Breaths that don't match, and won't match once one is suddenly stopped. But if the Tyrels don't notice the odd shadows and movement from the hidden camera set up just behind me, if this doesn't go to the plan I was certain would work... I can't be certain of which breath will be cut short first.

Hayley stares at me for several drawn-out moments, as if she's searching for something behind my hard, resentful brown gaze. Her own hazel eyes trail down to my neck, dark locks protecting the gradually fading bruise, and she scoffs lightly with a slight smile, looking down and taking a step back. I watch her intensely, glued to the spot, the recorder in my pocket feeling so obvious even though it's not, like it's burning through the material it's tucked into.

"Your father did nothing," she echoes lowly, looking vaguely distant and dazed until she meets my eye again. "Do you really believe that?"

I don't answer her.

"Your father," she continues, after a beat of silence, "did everything. He was everything. And you had to ruin what was meant to be, didn't you?"

"What did I do, then, Hayley?" I prompt her. "What exactly did I ruin?"

She glares at me. "You don't even know, do you? You made me do this. Your dad was such a sweet man," Hayley says, "even when he didn't need to be. He was so nice to everyone. Bobby always wanted to help, to get things done properly, and he always did. And Judith," her thoughtful expression sours at the name, and my jaw clenches, "was different. She was like some kind of perfectionist, wasn't she? Everything and everyone had their place. She was so sure of everything, it was all planned out and seen to. But Bobby took more care. You know, they were only together because it worked out."

"Worked out?" I question, a brow raising.

"Of course. They both wanted the same job, cultured, wealthy. It was probably set up for them by their parents or something. They weren't in love. Judith wasn't a lover. Bobby needed me. I understood. I was there for him. No one was ever nicer to me than he was, Holly. No one really cared. But Bobby never stopped caring. From the moment I met him when I was moving into the area. I was one of his first proper clients. He was only twenty-four. Married, but not loved. The best eight months of my entire life."

She's quiet for a moment in thought, practically reliving it, and I stare at her darkly. My mum and dad, married, and Mum none the wiser to Hayley trickling into their life, into Dad's life. For eight months.

Eight months.

And Dad let it happen.

"But all of a sudden," her voice picks up, and I blink, focusing on her apprehensively, "Judith's pregnant. And now Bobby has to think about his responsibilities. As a husband, and now, as a father. And because he's so nice and caring and careful, he decides that he has to be there for you. And those eight months would only be eight months."

Hayley stares at me grimly, looking almost on the verge of tears.

"He cried when he told me," she whispers, eyes abnormally wide. "Cried. He had to be this person that he had been forced to become, and having me around, oh, well, it wasn't right, apparently. It wasn't fair on Judith, on you. But do you know what's not fair? Fourteen years!"

She screams the last two words in a frenzy, and I stop myself from flinching, watching her silently.

"I... had to wait... fourteen years," Hayley breathes shakily, "to see Bobby again. Just as we said. Fourteen years of love that you stole from me, and I just had to be patient. And then, after all of that torture and time and tears... it turns out... Bobby doesn't even remember the promise we made. He breaks it. He wants to be with Judith and you, and seeing me, some ghost of his past, is mortifying. He rejected me, for you. And I couldn't let it happen."

Silence swallows us up again, my mouth ajar at how firmly she believes in her words, that she's right, that she was fighting for love. She's so hopelessly twisted up into her delusions that I can't break it, no one can.

"No," I say quietly, looking at her in disgust. "Clearly not."

Hayley scowls. "Don't you give me that look, Holly. If anyone should be upset here, it's me. He was never yours, you know. He was mine."

"He was never yours," I spit. "Bobby Cassia was my dad, and he always will be. If you really loved him, you wouldn't have killed him."

"You're wrong," she seethes. "Not that I expect you to understand. You could never comprehend what we had. Love is so precious. So, so..."

"Are you saying my dad didn't love me?" I ask, raising my brows expectantly, and Hayley gives me a look of fake pity.

"Well, I don't think so," she tells me, "not as much. Not nearly as much. But then I come back, and he chooses you. Not me." Her tone turns poisonous. "Bobby looked so afraid, and shocked, like he thought I'd left him alone for good, like I'm some ghost from the past. And then Judith's brought along, because he can hardly defend himself on his own."

"So, my dad disappeared because you pulled him away from the party while the cake was being cut," I deduct, "he runs to get Mum, or Mum goes after him, away from the party. To the basement, where you said you'd wait for him. They try to make you see sense, and you kill them."

Hayley just stares at me with an almost childish, pouty glare, her hold on the gun tightening.

"Did you know you were going to kill them before you did, then?" I persist. "That empty vinyl case you left me. The music was playing down here when I found them."

Her glare turns into a smug smile that I have to hold myself back from slapping off her face. "I do love Lesley Gore. And I didn't want to kill him, Holly. I so hoped that he'd choose me, like he always used to. But he knew what would happen if he went back on our promise. And he did. So I did what I had to."

"What promise?"

"I asked him, all those years ago, if he'd always run with me. Like the song says. Away from Judith. Away from you. To be with me, like we were always supposed to be. And if he didn't, I'd have to do something bad. So he could be with me, even in death, if he wouldn't in life."

"You asked him to run with you," I repeat harshly. "That's it. And he said yes?"

"Of course. He promised."

"Did he even know what he was promising? That could mean anything, Hayley."

"Well, it didn't mean just anything," she retorts in annoyance, "I asked him to run with me, and I'd played him that song lots of times before. He thought it was funny. Run with me, always and forever. As soon as he could. As soon as you turned eighteen."

"And my dad being my dad agreed because he was a people pleaser and didn't know what the hell you were talking about." I've lost almost all my patience by this point, daring to step closer to her. "He didn't agree to you murdering him and my mum if he didn't wreck the family for you, Hayley. You're delusional."

I half expect her to scream at me again, but she takes in a deep breath and holds it for a while, before breathing out slowly, shaking her head at me.

"You'll never understand, Holly. I don't expect you to. You did this to yourselves. And now, I've got to finish it."

Hayley raises the gun, and I instantly take a step back, eyeing the horrible weapon, the same one that caused all the pain before, and one that threatens to cause the pain after.

"It's your turn to cry now, Holly."

Then there's a bang, and I flinch with a gasp, blinking.

But I'm still alive.

I stare wide-eyed at the gun in Hayley's hand, but it's not smoking. Instead, the basement door was thrown open to make the noise, and a figure stands blocking the light from its rectangular entrance. Dark hair, a scowl full of hatred and scorn, and piercing eyes. I try not to smile slightly, but fail.

It's Elias.