Life After Z

Chapter 39 - Everett

None of us could resist the temptation of a hot shower once we reached the locker rooms. Jen peeled off to the women's side while Cooper, Sebbie, and I quickly stripped out of our filthy clothes and practically dove into the shower stalls. There were shower curtains, granting us privacy, not that any of us really needed it. Living in close quarters on the truck had left very little to the imagination.

The first five minutes under the hot spray felt fucking life-altering. I had forgotten what hot water pounding down on my tight muscles even felt like. The only thing better than this was the look on Ivy's face when I made her come as I finger fucked her. If only she would join me in this shower and finally let me take control. I would fuck her up against this wall, on the changing room bench, and then in the pool for good measure.

Fuck, I couldn't get the look of her jacking herself off on my dick out of my head. I literally have been thinking about it non-stop for nearly twenty-four hours.

Maybe this is what going crazy feels like because there is no way that this is normal.

And right now I should be on cloud fucking nine. I was taking an honest to god hot shower, just ate fresh eggs for breakfast, and Ivy told us that we could stay. Everything was good. Yet, instead of thinking of any of that, my mind kept boomeranging back to the fact that Lucas didn't climb down that ladder with us. Meaning that right now he was with Ivy.

Making his move. Had to be.

Jealously, thick and sour, pulsed through my thoughts and I barely restrained myself from climbing up that rinky-dink ladder butt-ass naked and lathered in soap to see what the fuck they were doing. But not only was I not that crazy, I knew that I had no right to the possessive feelings surging through me. Ivy hadn't promised me anything. Quite the opposite actually. Meaning that I had to fucking ignore the insane urge to claim her and stay where I was.

Fucking Lucas and his fucking nice guy routine. Ivy was just the type to fall for a guy like him. He was level-headed, kind, an amazing father, and one hundred percent the smart choice in this equation. Ivy was genius-level brainy, meaning that she would take the smart choice. That was what I was getting stuck on. My entire life, women had practically thrown themselves at me because they wanted a taste of fucking the bad boy that knew how to get them off like they have never experienced before. Women wanted me for my body and my level of dominance.

They didn't want me because of my shining personality or smarts.

Ivy had made it fucking clear that while we were moltant hot together, it wasn't enough for her. She knew exactly what I could offer her and had zero fucking problems walking away from me. I didn't lose graciously. That shit just wasn't in my DNA. I loved Lucas like a brother and would die for him but fuck, there was no way in hell I was just going to step aside and let him ride into the sunset with the perfect woman.

Several minutes later, Lucas finally made it into the locker room and I didn't hesitate to confront him. I walked straight out of my shower stall and examined him for any evidence that Ivy had given him the same masturbation special that resulted in my continuously hard dick. His clothes were all in order, but he had a goofy-ass smile on his face that pissed me off. I could imagine exactly what would put that kind of grin on his mug.

"Where the fuck have you been?" I growled even though I knew perfectly well that he had been with Ivy.

Lucas' smile only grew as he let my anger slide right off his back. "Just clearing the air with Ivy. Even though she put the caveat on us staying here for now, I think she wants us here. I think this is really going to work."

Of course, she wants us here. We wouldn't be here if she didn't. Ivy may be compassionate but she wasn't a fucking push-over. She had strength that I could only dream of. If she really thought we were bad news, she would kick us out and go back to her solo life in a heartbeat.

"You had to have that conversation in private?" I said, not bothering to hide the accusation in my voice.

"Yeah, I did," Lucas said, his fucking smile finally dimming as he caught onto my mood. "What's your problem?"

"You. You are my fucking problem. You and your perfect nice guy thing you got going on for you. I mean fuck. She even loves your son. How the fuck am I supposed to compete with the whole family package that comes with you. Maybe I can offer to knock her up. I can provide her with a family too. I can do the whole doting father thing," I said, talking more to myself than him but he most definitely took notice of what I was saying.

"Knock her up? Compete? Jesus Everett. Do you even hear yourself right now? Ivy isn't something to win and bringing a child into this world to trap a woman is a level of wrong I thought you were incapable of," Lucas told me in a voice laden with disbelief and disgust. His accusation hit me hard because he was right. That fact only pissed me off more. "Why are you even talking this way in the first place? You are sleeping with Jen, not Ivy. If you going to go all green monster on someone, it should be Coop, not me."

"I'm pretty sure it was Ivy creaming all over my dick yesterday, not Jen," I hissed, feeling like I had something to prove. Lucas flinched away from my words and looked shocked.

"What?" he croaked, the word sounding painful as it escaped his lips. Great, now I felt like an even bigger asshole. I swallowed hard and forced myself to explain.

"We didn't fuck. Ivy was majorly pissed off and shit happened. It was more anger than anything else. I got her off and then she walked away."

Lucas took a moment to process my words and then said in a hesitant voice, "So she didn't pick you."

And I was back to being ten shades of pissed off.

"Doesn't mean that she won't choose me. Just means that I fucked up and have some ground to make up before she trusts me," I growled back.

Lucas' smile returned, but this time it had an edge to it. "Yeah, I don't think that is going to happen. You said some really bad stuff. You may have had angry... whatever it is you and Ivy did yesterday, but I just got a real kiss that was full of promise. I will take that any day of the week. It goes great with my whole nice guy routine," Lucas mocked and I had to bite the side of my cheek to stop the litany of assholery that was about to burst out of my mouth.

Lucas pushed past me to head to the showers but only made it a few steps before turning back. Once again his smile was gone and this time he looked deep in thought. I squared my shoulders and faced him head-on. Almost subconsciously I raised my chin, signaling my intended challenge. "Just to be clear here. You are planning on pursuing a relationship with Ivy, even though I believe that she could be my forever person?" Lucas said and my heart squeezed in my chest.

I loved Lucas like a brother. We were a family. A post-apocalypse, badass family that I loved. And right now he was asking me for something that was completely in my power to give him. I could back off and watch as he rode off into the sunset with my perfect woman.

But fuck. I couldn't do that. I simply wasn't masochistic enough to live every day watching Lucas have the happiness that I wanted for myself.

"What if she is mine?" I asked and watched the pain and conflict I was feeling fill Lucas' green eyes. It took a moment but his hardening resolve was almost a tangible thing. He also loved me like a brother but was also choosing to fight for Ivy.

May the best man win.