911/911 Lone Star One Shots

I Don't Wanna Talk Right Now

Bobby noticed as soon as he laid eyes on Buck. Athena noticed by their second interaction. Something wasn't right, he wasn't himself. He was too quiet. He was keeping to himself. Definitely not normal Buck.

Everyone else at the barbecue seemed to either not notice or chalked it up to an off day. Nobody mentioned it, but Bobby and Athena were worried. This was practically their son.

"Hey Buck?" Bobby spoke from where they were standing a foot apart at the kitchen counter. Buck didn't respond, silently staring at nothing. Bobby's eyebrows furrowed, looking around to make sure nobody else was watching.

He stepped closer and laid a hand on his arm, making Buck nearly jump out of his skin. "Hey, just me. Come help me with the grill?"

Buck scoffed lightheartedly. "You don't need help." He spoke softly, the act of talking feeling like a large feat. Just saying those four words felt like trying to move a mountain.

"Come keep me company then." He squeezed Buck's shoulder and guided him out the back door. The only ones outside were Chim, Denny, and Jee, but they were distracted playing a game in the yard.

Buck stood beside Bobby as he opened the grill and flipped the meat.

"You okay?" Bobby asked him as he closed the grill lid.

Buck nodded and Bobby's concern only grew more. Buck wasn't speaking much and that wasn't normal.

Bobby set the spatula down and turned to face him. "I'm having a hard time believing that, kid. You're way too quiet; you've barely spoken at all since you got here."

Buck just shrugged his shoulders, beginning to bite his lip. Bobby stared at him worriedly and Buck felt himself shattering under his gaze.

Bobby could read him like a book, had been able to since the day they met. If he looked too close, he'd know. He was going to make him talk about it. He would cry. There's too many people for this. He shouldn't have come. Buck started to panic, his lower lip trembling as breathing began to feel difficult.

Bobby's eyes widened when he recognized the impending panic attack. "Okay, alright. Hey, you're okay. You're okay. Come here, come with me. I'll get us out of here." He assured him, guiding him back towards the door with his hand on his shoulder.

Walking back into the house, the overwhelming sound of conversations and laughter immediately made Buck more tense. His breath hitched and his entire body began to shake.

"Go to the front door. I'm right behind you. You're doing so good, go on." Bobby spoke softly before releasing his grip on him. He watched as Buck shakily took one step after another towards the front door, moving slowly without anyone acknowledging him.

Bobby found Athena talking with Karen in the kitchen. "Hey, I've got to run to the store to get chips. Can you watch the grill?" He saw Athena about to question him and cut her off. "I'm taking Buck with me."

Athena got the message immediately and nodded. "Sure thing."

Bobby quickly walked after Buck to the front door and grabbed his keys. He put his hand on Buck's shoulder again and led him out the door.

"You're okay. You're doing good. Get in the truck, we'll escape everything for a bit." He coached him, opening the passenger door and helping him in.

Bobby rounded the truck and got in, starting it and beginning to drive away from the house. The radio was off, giving Buck a break from overwhelming stimuli while he worked on calming his breathing back down.

When Bobby, who had been listening intently to Buck's breathing, heard it return to a fairly normal pattern, he pulled the truck into a parking lot.

"How do you feel now? Did getting away help a little bit?" He asked, turning to face his unofficial son.

Buck nodded, looking down at the floorboards.

"Good. Talk to me, buddy. What happened?" He looked at him worriedly, watching the gears turn in his mind.

After a moment, Buck pulled his phone out and began typing. Bobby started to question it but stopped when Buck handed him the phone.

I don't feel like talking. Can I type it out instead?

Bobby handed him back the phone. "Of course, whatever makes you feel comfortable. Do you feel sick or something? Does your throat hurt?"

Buck typed again, the sound of his thumbs against the screen the only noise filling the vehicle before he handed it back to Bobby.

Not sick. Throat fine. Talking just feels too hard right now.

"Okay, that's alright. What's going on?" He handed the phone back. Buck hesitated before typing again, this time longer than before.

Today is three years since tsunami and I'm really anxious. Nobody remembers what day it is and I don't want to care either but my mind keeps replaying it. I can't calm the anxiety and don't want to talk because I'll cry and I don't want to. I should've just stayed home today by myself. I'm sorry for this

Bobby read the words and shook his head. "Oh kid. Don't apologize, it's not your fault. Being around a ton of people probably isn't helping, is it?"

Buck shook his head. Being around a lot of people in an overwhelming environment was indeed unhelpful today.

"Do you want to go home?"

Buck reluctantly nodded, feeling horrible for not going back to the get together but unable to even fathom the idea of heading back to the overwhelming environment.

"Okay, I'll take you home." He spoke in a soothing voice, doing his best to keep Buck calm. "Everything's okay, alright? You're safe."

Buck nodded, leaning his head against the window as Bobby began to drive again. He must've fallen asleep because the next time he opened his eyes, Bobby was unbuckling his seatbelt and picking him up.

"I-I'm awake. I can walk." He protested softly as Bobby closed the door with his shoulder.

"Just rest, kid. I got you." He assured him, beginning to walk into the building to Buck's door. Buck wanted to protest but he just laid his head on Bobby's shoulder and let it happen.

Bobby unlocked the door with his spare key and laid Buck on the couch. Buck expected him to leave and hurry back to the barbecue, but he sat down beside him instead.

"You're- don't you need to get back?" He whispered, his head beside where Bobby was sitting.

"Of course not. I'm staying right here with you." He told him, pulling him closer so his head rested on his leg. "Whatever you need, tell me. I'm here. You can type it when talking's too much."

Buck felt his breath hitch again as tears sprung to his eyes. Bobby wasn't leaving him. He felt guilty, but another part of him was relieved to not be completely alone.

As tears began to fall down his cheeks, Bobby picked him up and brought him closer. Buck began to cry harder with his head against Bobby's shoulder.

"It's okay. You're okay." Bobby assured him, one hand rubbing his back and one hand carding through his hair.

Buck cried until his body was too physically exhausted from it and he fell asleep. Bobby still held him close, comforting him even in his sleep.

He pulled his phone from his pocket and saw concerned messages from Athena:

What's going on with our Buck

Everything okay?

It's been a long time, should I have patrol looking for you two?

Bobby I need an answer here

He typed back a message with one hand, keeping at least one hand on Buck to make him feel secure while he slept.

I'm with Buck at his apartment, not coming back for awhile. Just tell people he's sick so I took him home and stayed to take care of him

He knew Athena wouldn't mind; Buck was basically their kid. He'd stay by his side for as long as it took for him to feel better again.