03 Shower

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Once safely secluded in the bathroom, V leaned on the door for a while, regrouping. What a pathetic display. She hit on him and then cried when he wouldn't bite. It didn't exactly support her claim about not being a child.

She was sure she would've handled herself with more grace, had it been only about sex. That was easy. Pick a cute guy, give him the eye, buy him a drink and from there it was pretty much free fall. She'd done it a few times to take the edge off and not once got turned down.

But everything always somehow ended up a mess when feelings got involved. This wasn't the first time she'd made a complete fool of herself.

She remembered the breathing technique Vik had taught her to calm her nerves when her implant was acting up. In through the nose, slowly out through the mouth. She could feel her shoulders loosening. The knot in her stomach was bound to stick around for a few days, but she could live with that.

I'm glad he's got more brains than you.

V pushed off the door in a sudden surge of irritation and headed to the full-length mirror in the shower.

'Fuck you, Johnny. You know how shitty I'm feeling right now. Don't make it worse."

You're better off, trust me. He's way too old for us.

'Speak for yourself.'

V stabbed her gaze into her reflection and frowned. Her hair was boring. Without the piercings, her face looked strangely bare, and frankly, not very interesting. The dress was nice, but failed to cover up the snake tattoo, and the combination was just... wrong.

Average pretty. Not worth looking at twice.

She shook her head to clear it and slipped out of the dress and panties. Bending over, she raked her fingers through her hair to free them from their fake curls. Then she took a wet-wipe from the stand nearby and wiped the stupid phony mask off her face.

Now she at least looked like a hot mess. Like she'd just been with a guy and enjoyed it.

Just look at that body. The boobs alone are gold. Would be a shame to waste it on someone like him. Corpo asshole.

Johnny materialized in the corner of the shower, casually sizing her up. V rolled her eyes and made no effort to cover up. She'd been living with him in her head for a while and knew there was no place she could hide from him. She'd accepted that some time ago.

'Anyone with enough eddies can have a body like that nowadays, Johnny,' she argued. 'He liked Wakako. A mature woman, he said. Smart, crafty, sophisticated, respected. And Japanese. They have a lot in common. What do I have that would beat that?'

Bullshit. Things in common don't automatically create attraction. And you're forgetting: I know you better than anyone. You don't give yourself enough credit.

'I'd given myself so much credit in the past few years that I'm over the limit here, Johnny,' she sighed. 'You know Wakako. She's cool, in control. She's got her shit together, while I pretty much swim in it my whole life. Who would want to deal with that? No wonder he reacted like he did.'

He's obviously broken. No normal man would refuse free sex with a pretty girl.

V chuckled. 'He's not as shallow as you. And clearly not enough of a dick to not be afraid of getting tangled in strings that might come with it. I should've known better. I've ruined something that could've been a lasting friendship—for nothing.'

Johnny tilted his head to the side, squinting at her from under his messy hair while puffing on his imaginary cigarette, but said nothing.

V assumed he was out of things to say, so she turned the water on and stepped under the shower. Johnny just watched her wash herself, causing a confusing mix of sensations between her legs. It was as if she was getting aroused by watching herself, only through an uninvited third party. She was slowly getting used to that, too.

You really do see him through pink-tinted glasses, he grumbled eventually. Wake up, V, it's all your fantasy. You felt lost, and so you discovered a father figure in him. You built him up into something he's most definitely not, and now you're all hormonal and exploitable. Be happy that he didn't feel like using and discarding you in more than one way. Because that's exactly what would've happened, V. Somewhere in that suppressed rational part of your mind, you know it as well as I do.

'Do I?'

I'm sure.

And he flicked out into nothingness.

V didn't feel like arguing. All his words had been hers at one point or another.

She'd been wary of Goro since the moment she opened her eyes, lying in that junkyard. She knew who he was, where his loyalties lay, what he was capable of. She knew she could be betrayed the moment she delivered the proof of Yorinobu's crime.

The issue was in the source of those thoughts: her brain, her experience, the slight paranoia developed in her line of work—first at Arasaka, followed by being a mercenary. Things like that happened more than often enough in Night City; perhaps in any city these days.

Her heart didn't share the impression. It wanted to believe. It needed to be loved and it recognized something in Goro her brain couldn't comprehend.

Her gut was telling her to trust him. Everything he could do as the man he was, he didn't have to. Not if he shared even a tiny fraction of what she felt for him. Not if he cared enough to not hurt her in the process of pursuing his agenda. And V was almost positive that he did.

Why else would he willingly spend so much time with her? He could've just ignored her. She was little help to him. All he really needed was for her to stay alive and around until he could crack her head open and show Hanako what was inside.

Could he have rejected her to protect her from something, somehow?

Oh, come on... What kind of shitty love stories did you read as a teen? It doesn't work like that. People are only looking out for their own skin. It was never different and it will never change.

Johnny's exasperation snapped her out of her introspection. Her doubts were back, twice as strong.

He was probably right. She wasn't worth keeping safe beyond her role as a witness. She meant nothing to Goro. Arasaka was his home, his career, his whole life. They had his trust and devotion. There was no way he would stick his neck out to protect her from them. Not after he got what he wanted.

It all seemed much clearer now. He'd rejected her, so he wouldn't develop any more feelings, any more care. If he had, he wouldn't be able to use her in every way necessary to prove his claim.

Jeezus, I thought you'd gone completely insane. Welcome back.

'Thanks, Johnny. At least you care. To some extent.'

Sure, now that you're back in yellow alert, I make a good target too, don't I.

'You know I have trust issues,' she shrugged at her reflection.

It's okay. I like you more when you're suspicious. I just can't understand how you don't trust someone who's literally in your head. One would think you know me well enough by now.

'Working on it, I promise.'

The door to the bathroom suddenly slid open. The silhouette was unmistakably Goro's. V's jaw fell and she breathlessly watched as he stepped inside, barefoot.

"I don't think I've said everything you needed to hear, V," he rasped softly.

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Thank you for any love you decide to leave ♥

Broken «Goro Takemura & female V» PART 1 🔞 ✔️Where stories live. Discover now