What Life Holds

6

"Meredith are you ready to look at treatment options" Miranda asked as she came in the room, she knew it was a lot and the couple was trying to process everything but Meredith's body was under a large amount of stress and so they had to start treatment soon.

"Yes, please Bailey," Meredith replied pulling closer into Arizona.

(Authors Note this may not be medically accurate)

"Well as you know there is two different types of lesions on your lungs, only one is cancerous but due to the nature of the second type we are unable to remove it. We can complete a surgery to attempt to remove as much of the lesions as possible, however due to the strain already put on your body we would not suggest it. We can start you on Chemotherapy treatments to try and destroy the cancerous lesions, and we can put you on the transplant list but while you have cancer, it will be hard to get UNOS to agree for you to be the recipient." Dr Bailey explained, her heart broke slightly she had explained very similar diagnosis to heaps of patients before but it was weird for it to be one of their own. The one and only Meredith grey sitting there.

"Miranda?" Meredith questioned this time not looking at Arizona.

"Yes,?" Miranda replied,

"How long?" Meredith question, pain dripping from her voice, she was avoiding eye contact with Arizona as she asked the question.

"Oh, you mean if you don't get treatment?" Miranda questioned hoping that wasn't what Meredith meant but Meredith get nodded. "Honey, if you don't get treatment I predict your lungs will completely succumb to the growths within 6months, once again Meredith I'm so sorry." Miranda explain praying, she wouldn't have to attend the funeral of another of her interns. "I'll give you guys have some time to discuss" Miranda sighed before leaving the room. Meredith grey may not be an intern anymore hell the women had won a Cathrine Fox award, and completed a trail for the cure of Parkinson's she was a world renown surgeon but in Baileys heart she was still the same sweet caring intern who'd walked in on her first day wide eyes and bushy tailed, ok maybe not bushy tailed, she was Meredith grey after all. Miranda smiled as she thought about how far her interns had come from fighting over holding instruments surgery's to running hospitals and setting the record for the longest solo surgery in the hospital.

Inside Meredith's room, Arizona and Meredith hadn't yet said a word to each other. Neither sure where to start.
"Mer?" Arizona started knowing that they would have to start somewhere. Meredith just looked at her, "Honey, I need to know what you are thinking please" Arizona begged as she looked into her wife's eyes.
"Zona, I don't know what I'm thinking, I...I.. I don't want to die, I'm not ready but I'm already so tired I don't know if I can fight." Meredith broke down looking into Arizonas eyes.
"Oh my love, hey it's ok. In the end this is your decision, I love you and will support you no matter what, if you want to fight I will be there every step of the way, and if you don't think you can then... then we will figure it out, I'll take time of work we can homeschool the kids for 6months we will make it work, Meredith I love you, I will support you now matter what, if your too tired to fight we can just go travelling for the next 6months enjoy the time you'll have left, until..." Arizona started to ramble, scared for her wife but knowing if she chose to fight it would be a big fight to win.

"Zona," meredith cut of Arizonas rambling, "I'm so tired but I want to be there for our kids I don't want them to lose another parent, Ellis never met her dad and poor Bailey barely remembers him. And Zola she remembers losing Derek, she felt it." Meredith cried pausing as she remembered Zola crying for night on end after her Derek died. "And Sofia, I can't leave her either, she lost mark when she was so little. But zona I'm scared, I'm so tired already and I saw what it did to Izzie, what if I fight and it still doesn't work what if I put our kids through that would it be better for them just to lose me now, then they don't have to suffer" now it was Meredith's time to ramble, as she broke down in her wife's arms. Arizona didn't say anything at first she just held Meredith as she cried, she knew it was a lot for her process. Eventually Arizona felt Meredith stop crying and look up to her, she was exhausted and Arizona would see it.
"I want to fight Zona," Meredith whisper, leaning back into Arizona's chest.
"Ok my love, then we will fight, I will be here every step of the way, I'll let Bailey know, ok you sleep my love, your going to need to rest so we can win this fight." Arizona cooed as she started to gently rub Meredith's back. Within second Meredith was asleep slightly snoring against Arizona. Arizona loved the way her wife snored, as looked down at her wife she sighed. She looked so peaceful in her sleep. As Arizona noticed Meredith's snoring became quieter she realised she was struggling just a little to get air, carefully she reached behind her grabbing the nasal cannulas and slipping it over her wife's face. As Meredith started to breath in the oxygen, her breathing became deeper and Arizona smiled, it was a small thing but knowing that her wife was relaxing and comfortable calmed Arizona. Just then Dr Bailey returned to Meredith's room. Dr Bailey had been trying to keep it somewhat anonymous who was in Meredith's room, she didn't need the whole hospital knowing what was going on. Meredith's name went around the gossip wheel enough times without the whole hospital finding out she now had cancer. Although Miranda knew it wouldn't be long before people started to realise something was up, the nurses where already suspicious of how much attention Dr Bailey was giving the case seeing as she didn't have a lot of time to spare being chief of the hospital.
"Shh" Arizona giggled slightly as Miranda re-entered the room.
"Oh, how's she feeling?" Miranda asked talking a seat next to Arizona she was glad that Meredith was getting some rest.
"As well as she can be for finding out she has cancer" Arizona replied making sure to keep her voice low as to not wake Meredith.
"And you, Arizona?" Miranda asked knowing it could be be easy on the other blonde either.
"I'll be ok" Arizona replied truthfully, Miranda smiled sympathetically, this poor family had been through so much and yet the universe still wouldn't leave them alone.
"Did you make a decision?" Miranda asked, she didn't want to push but the sooner they started treatment the better.
"She wants to try the treatment, she going to fight" Arizona replied smiling as she looked down at her sleeping wife.
"Good, well I'll go and start organising the treatment, you get some rest too Arizona, it's not just Meredith that needs it," Miranda explained, Arizona nodding her head. "It's best we start the treatment as soon as possible, so I'll be back in the morning and we can start her first chemo treatment ok" Miranda stated, before getting up to leave the couple alone.
"Thank you Mandy" Arizona replied, smiling up at her friend. They might all be doctors but they where also all friends and they both knew Meredith and Arizona was going to need them all as doctors and friends for the fight ahead.
"No worries, Ari, now get some sleep I'll see you in the morning" miranda replied before leaving Meredith's room once again.

"I love you Mer" Arizona cooed before, carefully removing her prosthetic and laying down next to Meredith, it didn't take her long to fall asleep, cuddling her love.

Authors Note
Sorry for the delay in posting, I work in the UK and I've had to work the full long weekend so didn't have much time to write. I also wasn't sure how to write this chapter but now I have a plan so should hopefully be able to go back to updating on alternative days with my other story "Meredith's pain". Anyway hope you enjoyed please leave me a comment telling me what you think.