Grey IV - Chains

Chapter 48 - Surrender

"You think I want you?" I placed just enough disbelief in my last word to make his navy eyes narrow ever-so-slightly.

"Then tell me to leave."

He pushed back his new blonde hair and readjusted himself in the chair, settling in more comfortably, his long limbs stretched out like some cat in his favorite sunny spot. He knew I wasn't about to tell him to go. He knew I wanted him there, needed it for my plan. I ground my teeth.

After an empty pause, he continued.

"No? Why not, little Angel?"

"Whatever you think this is tonight, it's not. We are training."

"Then train me," he said the words in a way that would make the devil himself blush, dropped his eyes to look up at me louchely.

I blew out a breath I hoped sounded of exasperation, praying it would draw his attention away from my thundering heartbeat that I was sure gave me away completely. This was not the plan, but...it wasn't an entirely bad plan.

"How do we start - the training, I mean - for your current, and my shadows," I over-clarified and his smirk darkened.

My traitorous heart leapt up into my throat as he rose from the chair and took the two strides needed to my bed.

"For your current," I reiterated.

He raised his hands in a surrendering manner, amusement sparkling in his eyes, so familiar, so similar to how they used to look. It made my stomach twist and my heartbeats slur into each other.

"I know. Just lightning and shadows. And I don't know about yours, but I think touch will help the connection. Just like a real current - it has to travel from one space to another, yes?"

There was no reason to say no, not without admitting more than I wanted to. So, I nodded to his side of the bed, giving him permission to sit and join me. He leaned back against my pillows and headboard, stretching his legs out toward the foot of the bed with a contented sigh. And he seemed it, content - maybe he was. But if a Fallen, Irin, could feel true contentment, I doubted it would come from sitting on a too-soft bed, identical to his own, just one room over.

It was difficult not to watch him, to try to figure out his inner workings, to drink in each movement, each tightening and loosening of his muscles, how the new marks on his skin rippled and shifted as he did, where the light and shadows fell across him. He was interesting and unknown and dangerous, just like the fire I used to associate him with. But even with fire being unpredictable, the element didn't suit him anymore - his lightning did though. Something more than just flames, more destructive, more chaotic, more powerful. Just more, just as he was now.

His eyes were gently closed - only for a few seconds, more of an extended blink than anything else - as he breathed out slow. I could almost see him incrementally relaxing each part of his body more and more, like it took some effort and concentration. I hated how much that seemed like the old him, but I enjoyed the opportunity to watch him unabashedly, uninterrupted.

Finally, he rolled his head to the side and opened his eyes, extending one hand into the expanse of bed between us in a silent request. I placed my hand in his waiting one and his long fingers curled around mine.

"Ready?"

I swallowed and nodded again.

It felt more like a vibration than a current, so fast and tight, a quiver at the cell level. It grew, almost feeling like our connection always had, even back to our first meeting in a little convenience shop in a nothing town. It made my chest ache. We had gone through so much since then, so much pain, with so much more to come if I couldn't get him back. I was scared, but determined. I was ready.